Beautifoolcrap!

Dear you,

2012-02-10T04:54:00.000+08:00

'Terukir di bintang tak mungkin hilang cintaku padamu..' (Yuna,2012)

Burning taste buds,

2012-02-09T16:40:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum and a very, good morning, i guess? (as it is already 1.30am when i'm writing this).

Phew, banyaknya habuk dalam blog. Sorry for not updating this little buddy, i am sooooo busy handling my life out there, so many things happened i don't have enough hands to work on everything. And now, i finally caught a bad fever and a very very bad cough that it even bleed sometimes :( When i went to the clinic a few days ago, the clinic was so sardine packed i nearly gave up queuing for meds. Ramainya manusiaaaa! Memang musim orang sakit kot, sebab weather sekarang macam kalinga jugak, kejap hujan kejap terik hmm mana taknya demam batuk semua. Thank Allah for easing up my business, i found a clinic not far from the town and it wasn't packed at all. Got a whole bunch of pills and syrups and lozenges, in which i don't really fancy consuming all of em, but for the sake of attending classes and other responsibilities awaiting for me in KL, i just have to. Hmm what else? Oh, the reason why i was on a hiatus last time is because life has been quite busy since i started my second semester. My timetable is not heavenly made anymore, it sucks because i have 5 days of classes including Saturday! I will never stop from bitching about this matter, not until the new timetable being released and kicks out my Saturday from the list pfft. Plus, my broadband reached its limit and i just keep refusing on paying the bills, till one day that i got myself a Blackberry Bold 4 (haruslah brag sebab dah lama dalam wishlist baru sekarang dapat hahaha) and i terdesak gila nak surf the internet just to figure out cemna nak activate BIS and everything pasal BB lololol laughed at myself a lot on that haha -.-

I really don't know what to write now, since i just took my drugs and the cough syrup really drives me sleepy. The brain needs some rest now, and yes i will be back in KL this Friday night insyaAllah after having a week-long holiday hehehe. Hope you guys are having fun too with your families and loved ones, it's the Love Month anyways right? Embrace your life, you never know what is waiting for you in the future :)

And on a positive note, I am happy now. No wait, i am happier now :)

February,

2012-02-02T02:12:00.001+08:00

Lamanyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa tak update blog haihz -__-

Kualalala Lumpur,

2012-01-17T01:07:00.000+08:00

Fully-loaded Andy.

So yeah, I'm in KL already! And that left me with a very unstable mood these few days actually. Probably because of the tiring moving in procedures, (yeah i easily get cranky and moody if i get tired lol) i can hardly sleep last night, and have no mood to go online here cuz the internet connection sucks big time, screw Celcom. And i don't know why, i have no mood to do anything. Mungkin moodswing sebab pindah tempat baru kot, belum selesa lagi. Yeah, aku pun tengah takda mood sebenarnya nak update sekarang, but i just need to do something. Its just for the sake of doing something instead of nothing. Hmmm :/

My timetable for this semester sucks big times too. I finally have class to attend on Saturdays and i have like two days with night classes until 9pm! I only have Friday and Sunday as my off days and the rest, yeah. It will be hard for me to consider going back to BP on weekends after this :( That's one thing. The second one is, yes my apartment is not that far from the campus...but only if you drive to go there. The distance is quite killing if you prefer walking only. Since i am a student and always on a budget, i opt for walking instead of driving to save money on fuel. It's quite tiring (tipulah kalau tak penattt magadd) but takpelah, fikir positif. Mungkin lepasni mampu milik kaki seindah Heidi Klum? Mungkin lepasni mampu milik berat badan ideal seringan kapas? Hahahaha mintak maap lah kalau dah on the way balik rumah pun ada akak jual benjo besar dan sedap dengan harga mampu milik RM1.80. Forever tergoda okay. Ah, lapar pulak bila cakap pasal benjo akak salon tuh. Haishhhh :(

Anyways, i'm not coming back to Batu Pahat this Chinese New Year since i only have 2 days off only for it and it's quite money/energy/time consuming if i decide to go home. I am not that broke, but i am really on a tight budget man. Banyak kena save for my new house. Budget tak boleh lari kalau tak memang puas sepanjang bulan lah sobs :( Takpelah, just hoping for my family to come visit me here then :(

Banyak sangat sad smiley dalam post ni dah kenapa? Emo gila. Kbye

Moving in,

2012-01-12T23:18:00.002+08:00

So i've decided to move in to my boyfriend's apartment in Kuala Lumpur, since aku dah tak duduk hostel lagi for next sem. It must be awkward i must say, but living with the guy that i love the most is like the best way to start my 2012. Ah, can't imagine doing the chores together, love is always in the air ♥

Okay tipu je hahahahaha berderau darah mak haku kalau baca nih haha the truth is im moving to my first rental house this Saturday with my collegemates. Excited much? Not really. It's not the best house i can ever wish for, but at least...yeah. What i really wanna say is, KL rental house rates are beyond crazy! You need at least RM1k in your hands to rent at least, a 2-bedroom apartment unit. That excludes the deposit + utility fees blablabla haihz. And most of the units are not furnished or partially furnished. Rumah sewa aku ni not furnished maka lebih duit perlu dilaburkan to buy stuff for the house. So that's basically the main point im writing this, that is to list out things that need to be brought or bought for my new small home. Nah, i won't call it 'home', home is only when i am back in Batu Pahat. Belum balik KL pun dah rindu Batu Pahat, macam mana? T_T

So far, i manage to figure out just a couple of things to bring. A mattress, fabric wardrobe and a small study table. For the house, i will try to bring an electrical cooker - saves money on gas, saves kitchen area. Haven't discussed with other housemates, i am so blurred i need the help from you guys to help me list out EVERY single stuff that we should have in our new house! This is my very first time moving into a house away from my parents, hence the mess in the head. Dangggg i feel old now, brb crying T_T

p/s : Kalau nak bagi tips pasal rumah sewa pun okay jugak hehe. Thank you in advance! xoxo

Invisible man,

2012-01-11T20:47:00.000+08:00

You disappeared, at last. You became the person you promised you won't be turning into. You ignored me, you didn't remember my birthday, you don't text anymore. You walked away, just like that.

And how i feel so stupid right now for putting hopes on you all these years. Congratulations, you make me look pathetic. You won.

Splashes and sands,

2012-01-10T04:53:00.029+08:00

It's quite a time since the last time i'd been in the water. Yknow, i may not be the best swimmer but i find the best in me whenever i have contacts with water, especially at waterfalls and seas. Suka terapungkan diri, dip both ears into the water, and pandang langit. The blue canvas, fluffy white cotton clouds, birds flying just above you. Ah, the feeling is so calming. Matahari terik pun tak terasa. Tenang betul. Kalaulah dulu aku pilih untuk ke UiTM Dungun, memang everyday rasanya pergi tenangkan diri kat laut. I've been trying like forever to learn how to swim, but i don't know why i keep on failing every single time. Sigh. I keep this one dream since high school, that is getting a diving license and have sweet escapes to beaches around Malaysia and scuba diving.

But first thing first, i need to really learn how to swim. And overcome my fear of getting drowned. That's tough, at least for me. But i'll try, i'll try :)

Being 20!

2012-01-08T20:33:00.002+08:00

It's the 8th of January today, my most favourite day of all time hehe :D Alhamdulillah, syukur ya Allah i'm already a 20-year-old young lady now! I honestly can't believe that i am actually leaving my teen years, knowing that i won't be able to turn back anymore to fix anything that i wish i could before. It's time for me to accept everything that had happened throughout my teen years. And to accept that those things, are actually lead me to who i am right now, right at this moment.

I thank God for lending all these years for me to have the chance to walk my own life on this temporary life. I thank God for lending me the air i breathe everyday for the past 20 years. I thank God for lending me such a wonderful family to be with me along this whole journey, through ups and downs, smiles and sorrows, i am really grateful. I thank God for everyone that came into my life all this while, some of them stay, and others go. But everyone came and gave different happiness for me to cherish, grief for me to hold on, and everything that i got from them, are lessons for me to learn. People around me taught me how to live, and Allah is the mightiest guide i can refer to.

Recapping the years makes me surprise, for i actually survived and still alive after all those bitter times i faced all this time. I lost a lot of people - my grandpa, my cousin, my niece, not forgetting a number of friends and acquaintances too. Seeing them gone made me realize life is just too short. We all have so many things to do, but neither of us have enough time to do all of them. And yet, we still busy spending our lives worrying about little things and pressuring ourselves with the problems we have instead of settling it calmly and continue enjoying the beauty of life. And yeah it's a note to myself too. I worry too much back then, i frown more, and even the small things can make me angry or sad. I was too busy ruining my own life. That's one thing i regret the most.

Allah had placed me in various places, and from there, i met a lot of people who actually play a huge influence in myself. After finishing my PMR in TIGS at my hometown, i was sent to Sekolah Sains Muar to continue to my upper form. I must say, Samura is the best high school that i can ever wish for. As usual, of course there's a lot of dramas occurred throughout the time but guess what, they just strengthen me up and make me a tough cookie like i always am up until now ;)

Samura 2008/2009. Perfect high school year :')

UiTM Puncak witnessed my first step into the college life. I was taking Asasi Sains back then, majoring in pure science. This is the place where i learn almost everything about love, yeah i must say that i was quite brought away with this love matter here hahaha. During this phase, i slowly sensed that i am actually growing more mature, maybe not physically but mentally,yes. Somehow, my anger management is superb at this point, but the other side of it, i think i become more sensitive. I don't know whether it is a good thang or not. In UiTM, aku belajar untuk berkawan dengan semua orang, despite their cultural backgrounds, religious beliefs, and attitude. I learn about the diversity of the society. I learn to sit and talk with people w different perspectives in their opinions, exchanging stories and experiences etc. I learn not to judge people, because UiTM people actually surprise me a lot. I become good friends with people who i secretly hate at first, hehe. Thank you Allah for this opportunity. UiTM also cracked the coconut shell for this little frog over here. My vision is wider :)

Before entering degree life, i worked at Parkson Batu Pahat for awhile as the customer service representative for two months. I must say that this is the point where i learn the adult life, since my colleagues are all in their mid 20s and above, making me the youngest worker there. I witnessed more grown up problems, problems that probably will be hunting me when im turning into an adult in a couple of years soon. I saw my friend having tough times dealing with his financial crisis when he got small kids to raise, nak kahwin tapi duit tak cukup, flirtings among the workers, yang panjang tangan songlap duit company etc, everything. Semua benda yang hanya mampu lihat dalam tv je but actually it really happens in real life. My workplace taught me to be more prepared once i reached my adulthood one day. The problems are bigger and worse. And Alhamdulillah, working at the customer service department really enhanced my social skills and boosted up my confidence level, it really, really, helped me a lot. Thank you Allah once again :)

Ahhh, so much that had happened through my 20 years of living on this planet. So many people, so many incidents, so many tears, so many laughters, and yeah, i owe Him all of these chances he gave me. 20 years of living is not a short period, but i know i will face even more after this. Well, who says growing up is easy? Moga aku dapat manfaatkan lagi usia aku di dunia ini, biarlah hidup aku lebih terisi dengan perkara-perkara yg baik, dan dikelilingi dgn manusia yg boleh memimpin aku ke jalan yg benar, lurus dan diredhai Allah. Harap luka-luka lama dijadikan peringatan untuk diri ini tidak mengulangi apa-apa kesilapan yg lalu. Amin :)

Okay, im really gonna miss my teen life after this! But trust me, perangai aku akan tetap sama hahahaha just that maybe, theres a pinch of maturity and a dash of seriousness in it. Need to be more responsible in order to create a good future for me and my family. And my future family, ehem. HAHA. So i create a couple of goals to be achieved within my 20s. Tak salah kot kalau berangan sikit, dreams are actually the first stepping stones to turn our goals into reality, aite? :)

Excel in every semesters with Dean's List, insyaAllah
Graduate from business school with honors, insyaAllah
Get married by the age of 25 (seriously, hahaha) insyaAllah
Further in Masters in Islamic Finance, insyaAllah
Get a secure job, and have fun with it insyaAllah
Get myself a car :D insyaAllah

I really hope i can make them happen, with God's permit of course. May Allah ease my journey after this hehe :)

Happy birthday to myself! Harap sedar diri dan act wiser and more mature after this haha T_T And yes, Happy Birthday to Stephen Hawking, Elvis Presley and Maria Ozawa too as well! HAHA

I thank God, for everything.

The price of not being skinny,

2011-12-16T02:47:00.001+08:00

I never feel confident with how i look. Especially when i'm having my semester break now. Lack of exercises, more food stock around me, internet, television etc haih semuanya penyumbang kepada penternakan lemak yg berjaya -.- Being home makes me a superlazy bum. I can feel that my cheeks are breeding, my hips is getting wider and my arms..ergh can't even look at them now. Sigh, i feel so bad right now, i feel like i'm destroying my own body. But its so hard to say 'No!' to food, you should understand that T__T

But i guess its about time now. I'd undergo plenty of diet plans since i finished high school but none of them actually works. I used to starve myself, i used to vomiting, i used to do intense workouts but its just a half-way attempt. Maybe i'm lacking some motivations to push myself to be consistent with my plan. Maybe.

My boyfriend used to tell me that i'm beautiful, pretty, cute and whatnot. But screw him, i never believe his words hahaha. Guys, just be honest. Takkan takde sikit pun dalam hati nak dapat bini lawa kan? I mean, hello, i'll be your trophy or something soon, i'll be tagging along when you're meeting your friends, clients. You'll be introducing me to yr big family, and yes, i'm going to be the mother of yr kids. So of course due to mentioned reasons, i wanna make you proud to have me, baby (ah, feeling dah ada suami lah pulak haha). The worst nightmare is when you malu nak bawa bini you ni jumpa kengkawan you sebab i tak cantik. Omg that is so mean kot T__T Ok fine if you tak kisah pun, I KESAH. I perempuan, for sure i akan rasa forever insecure with what people will think about me. Lagi-lagi kalau you handsome, lagi lah self-esteem i low, tahu?

"Kau kan hensem, kau boleh dapat yg lagi lawa kot," bisik sahabat kepada bakal suami.

"Oh, so this is your future bride? Oh hai," tegur sahabat perempuan bakal suami yang persis Miranda Kerr.

"Kau tengok si Ahmed tu segak betul, tapi pengantin perempuan tu biasa je tengoknya" kata Cik Tipah.

"Tu lah namanya cinta itu buta, Pah" jawab Cik Senah penuh yakin.

Mintak simpang please, T____T

Maybe i should learn to love myself more. Learn to embrace whatever that i already have with me. No i don't aim to be skinny, i still want my curves (eceh) but i want a prettier one, a healthier one :)

Till then, much love xx

These, i want.

2011-12-13T22:28:00.004+08:00

Just some random things i want, PRONTO.

And since my birthday is approaching very soon, so yeah. *cough*gifts*cough*

I love you ♥ k thanks bye hahahahahaha :P

Oh so random!

2011-12-12T17:58:00.000+08:00

For the past few days i'd went out from the house for quite a long period everyday to meet some friends who happened to be in BP for awhile. Since i haven't go out much from the first day i got my butt here back in my hometown for my semester break, having them here really made myself jumping all over in the room. At last, i can escape myself from ze house. Seriously, it is so boring to be 'grounded' all day in the house doing absolutely nothing zzz. Mom gave me an oven so that i can learn to bake something but i don't know whyyyy, baking is so not my thing! But i'll try someday, when i get REAL bored. Soon. One day, maybe. Errr hahahaha. Thank god there's my ukulele and guitar, at least i can sit and learn to pick the chords and strum like there's no tomorrow! But hari-hari duduk rumah main gitar, tak macam loser pulak kan -___-

My weekend was so filled with lots of activities and roamings. Met my highschool buddies Nad & Tiqa, Nona as well as my Parkson members too. Didn't watched any movies last week, i found myself to eat a lot instead. 2 rounds of Domino's, tea time at the Pinetree Hotel, McDonald's, dose and dose of Coolblogs, Rengit Coffee, KFC, lontong goreng, rojak mamak, mee goreng terbaik, and not forgetting a trip to Pesta's pasar malam where i quenched my thirst & hunger for watermelon juice and some other random local snacks. Dah serupa orang mengandung.

But honestly, Batu Pahat maybe is not in your vacation spot list, but if you wanna find a 'Food Heaven', it surely be on the top of your 'Must-Go' list! Great food, cheap deal, what else?

Asalnya nak cerita pasal kebosanan di rumah, but end up promoting Batu Pahat's local food zzz kbye

My early birthday gift,

2011-12-08T00:24:00.000+08:00

So earlier today, i received my first baby ukulele from my mom. Thank you so much ibu! Walaupun diri ni bukanlah sentiasa senonoh perangainya bila dengan ibu, but ibu still layan perangai mengada saya yg sebenarnya annoying ni. Well, tak rasa annoying ke bila asyik tunjuk gambar ukulele-ukulele comel dan colorful on the internet lepastu suruh tengok video awesome people yg buat cover songs using only ukulele on Youtube? Kononnye macam nak bagi hint and show how eager i am to own this little guy hahaha. Sorry ibu for my annoying acts but i can't help from not to love this thing! :3

Say hi to 'Chip'! He (it's a boy anyway haha :P) is brown in color, and tiny, and cute. so its kinda resembles chocolate chip (at least) to me. So yeah :D

Ukulele is a small guitar-like instrument that is originated from Hawaii. It has 4 strings only and comes in 4 different sizes too (each with different tone and volume). Mine is soprano, the smallest one, with the highest tone. I bought the Makala brand which is actually a good brand producing affordable yet very high-quality ukuleles, but still of course you can't compare it with Martin's or Fender's right..haha. I suggest Makala for ukulele beginners out there :D

Oh ya about the price, its only RM239 plus a gigbag for God's sake! Its a very good deal as ukulele is no cheap at all baby. Or if you feel that its still quite burning a hole in the pocket, you can grab the other model from Makala (i forgot the name though sorry hehe) that only comes with the price of RM189. Fuuukin deal! Actually i wanted to buy this model at first cuz it comes in 8 bold colors (obviously i want the pink one haha!) but mom says it looks like a baby toy hence this brown ukulele -__- But mine has slightly higher quality compare to the colorful ones. Well, the price difference explains all, no?

Since it has 4 strings only, i need to study the art of strumming and playing the chords all over again. And i remind you, fewer strings means harder, not easier (surprisingly zzz) and it isn't the easiest instrument to tune and keep in tune. But seriously once you got hooked to it, you will know how cool this thing is that eventually you won't want to play the guitar anymore. Well that's maybe an exaggeration but seriously bro, i pluck my ukulele more than my guitar now! Haha :P

Gosh i am so promoting ukulele right now. Hawaiians should pay me after this hahaha. And to those who are wondering, i bought my guitars and ukulele at the Sandman Guitar Centre, situated at Jalan Rugayah, Batu Pahat. Go feast your eyes with the guitars there, sure hidung lu berdarah sebab banyak sangat gitar best and cun tapi lu takda duit nak beli hahahahahaha -.-

Again, thanks ibu! :)

p/s: Trying to learn to play 'Valentine' by Kina Grannis once i already passed this freaking 'Brother John' song haha!

Here I am,

2011-12-04T14:47:00.000+08:00

...waited for so long. Just to get hurt.

Of holidays,

2011-11-28T23:40:00.011+08:00

So practically my first holiday week had already over. Nothing to sum much about the week, or in other words, i have successfully wasted the past whole week doing absolutely nothing, hahaha. Thank god my cousin Ikien came over and spent the weekend here, and as usual, each time they come over to Batu Pahat, one of the 'wajib' places to go is Umar's crib. Umar is the little boy in above picture, turned out to be the youngest among us the cousins hehe. We watched Puss In Boots too, and the movie is just 'okaaaaaay' for me. Nothing to be 'wow'ed. 'Happy Feet 2 is much better', my cousin said. Fine, i should watch Happy Feet 2 this week. Anyone? :D

Oh yes another thing i hope its not too late for me to wish a Selamat Tahun Baru and Salam Maal Hijrah to all Muslims all over the world, especially to my friends and whoever that reads this hehe. Alhamdulillah, another year, another chance to serve as a better Muslim. I hope everyone is taking the chance and use it properly, and this is a note to self too :)

Till then, oh no i wont make another new list on what are the things to be done this holiday, what to buy etc cuz i know, it will be left untouched and unsettled till God-knows-when hahaha so im just planning to have fun and roaming around, meeting people, attending events and stuff. And of course some series of shopping spree since there will be the Year End Sale, baby! (Y) We we we so excited hahaha :P

Chiao :8)

The road not taken,

2011-11-25T17:22:00.000+08:00

Sedang check page kelas di Facebook, tiba-tiba ternampak diorang tengah bincangkan hal subject registration for next semester. Gulp, cuak pulak sebab tak ada dalam memori pernah klik klik pilih subjek untuk next sem. Terus bukak portal UniKL and kononnya baru nak gelabah nak register subjek. Alih-alih, eh eh dah register? Terima kasih puan advisor ku Dr Syahida sebab dah tolong registerkan dah siap-siap muehehe but the bad side of it, tak mampu la nak pilih subjek ikut kesedapan hati diri sendiri.

So these are the subjects im going to take for my 2nd semester. Pergh serious ah dah nak masuk 2nd sem? Feels like its only yesterday i finished my Asasi programme -.-

1. Syariah Rules in Business Finance

2. Islamic Economics and Finance I

3. Managerial Finance

4. Business Ethics and Corporate Governance

5. Business Law

6. Business Communication

7. Arabic 2

With a total of 19 credit hours, at first i was like "Pheww nasib baik sikit" but when i go through the subjects, i went "Amende siak semua ni asdfghkl tak pernah dengar qwertyuiop die laaa like this die laaaa" =.="

Pffft ni lah padahnya bila budak sains gatal-gatal nak ambil finance. Hambek kau hambek hahaha -.-

But nevermind God, challenge accepted *flips hair* LOL go die now Raisya.

The tiger spirit,

2011-11-24T21:37:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum guys! Yes, i finally survived my first semester here Alhamdulillah hehehe. The final exam went good, but i still need to pray hard to get the best results since the papers were actually quite hard. Hopefully the lady luck is with me :D

The pictures above were taken at the time when i had a whole day out with a few classmates last Monday. The day began when i decided to go for a movie with Wan, planning to watch Happy Feet 2 but ended up watching the Immortals since Wan haven't watch it yet. Habis movie terus serbu Pizza Hut and took away 2 pans of pizzas to bring to Dataran Merdeka. The other 4 already waited us there, and it took nearly an hour to find a decent parking space for my car, and finally decided to just park randomly behind a random car lol.

Thank God Malaysia won, dan disebabkan malam tu hujan turun renyai-renyai, we watched the match under the rain for about 2 hours, and tak pasal-pasal haku demam the next day sampai merah-merah mata. Thanks to Jie for driving my car sampai ke Bangsar, memang dah tak tahan sangat kepala pening nak drive hihi.

So now im back already in Batu Pahat. Will be available all the time until 16th January 2012. Siapa nak ajak lepak, you know im just a call awayyyy hihihihi :3

And yeah, don't expect a constant update from me during the holiday haha :P

Temporary freedom,

2011-11-18T01:20:00.001+08:00

Alhamdulillah, 5 papers already down and i still have 2 more to kill. The final papers were not treating me that well but so far, i managed to push myself to answer everything on time. On top of everything, i have done my very best this time so i will just pray for the best after this. Anyway am so sorry for the short hiatus, too busy with revisions and Twitter in the same time lol :P My final will end on this coming Sunday (yes i still need to sit for my exam during weekend -.-) and after that, voila! 6 weeks of holiday for me yeay! :D I haven't plan anything for my holiday, but one thing for sure, i won't be working again haha enough with the 2 months experience back in Parkson last time haha. Enough rambling, I should hit the books back now. Have a good day ahead guys! Xoxo

Happy Elevens,

2011-11-12T14:33:00.000+08:00

I watched Immortals yesterday and i thought the movie was just 'OK', not that bad y'know. Its a good one for those who enjoy ancient Greek histories and myths on the Gods and whatnot, which is also referring to me hehe. I think the movie is great actually, but maybe because we already had more than enough Greek gods-based movies nowadays that it made Immortals just 'the another movie', not 'THE movie', get what im saying? Haha. In overall, i rated it 3.5 over 5 stars.

Hows your 11/11/11? Mine was a bit sucked at the end of the day. Earlier that day, i went to Cheras to watch this Immortals movie at Jusco Cheras Selatan with this one awesome friend of mine :D We queued for the 2pm showtime but we were just minutes away from the last ticket that we finally had to buy the 5pm tickets. There's nothing much to do in Jusco, so we decided to have our tea at Secret Recipe. Had slices of Oreo Cheese and Choc Indulgence w coffee and apricot slushie, we really stuffed ourselves very well haha.

My failed 11/11/11 starts after i had sent my friend to Puduraya. Stucked in a massive traffic jam and i was superhungry my tummy growled like mad, i went for shortcuts that cost me to langgar red lights twice T_T Since there's no KFC here in Bangsar (MAJOR BOO!) i have to drive all the way to PJ just to fill my crave for Snack Plate. But thanks to friends, they belanja me hihi sebab i already help to drive them there :D

One of my friends teringin nak masuk UM, since she never stepped into UM before. So i brought them there, pusing-pusing dalam UM. But no luck for all of us sebab kena tahan dengan pakgad -___- Id been there for zillions of times, tak pernah sekali pun kena tahan ok. But yesterday, kena tahan.

"Ni student ke pelawat?"

"Oh saya nak hantar kawan saya ni balik kolej" *tunjuk member kat belakang*

"Kolej berapa?" *check check kereta-.-*

"12, encik."

"Tunjukkan kad pelajar"

*pusing belakang dengan confidentnya* "Kau bawak tak kad pelajar?"

"Tak. Tertinggal kat bilik"

"Eh macam mana ni keluar tak bawak kad. Macam mana saya nak bagi masuk?"

"Kejap je ni encik. Nak hantar dia. Kitorg dari Johor datang melawat je ni"

"Nanti keluar kat mana?"

"Gate KL kat sebelah sana boleh keluar kan? Ha, kat situ lah"

*check kereta again. I think he jot down my car's plat number zzz*

"Ok."

I think UM is really not welcoming us that night. After we passed by the 10th college, there's like a bunch of dogs howling and barking and chasing after our cars all the way sampai near Pusat Sukan, and to make the night more malang-er, kereta terlanggar lubang that forced us to stop and check the tires. Thank god everything's okay T_T Tapi masa nak keluar UM, kena tahan lagi. Kena catat nombor kereta lagi.

UM memang dah benci aku. Nangissssssssss T_T

Immediately after we reached hostel, i was about to lock my car when DANGGG! i dropped and broke my car keys and the buttons are no longer functioning i need to lock my car manually now. How pathetic, how sad T_T

Uh and did i told you earlier that day in the morning, i was greeted by the view of my car all covered with birds' pooping? It took me an hour to clean all of it. And i did smell like shit after that. Damn you uncivilized birds -.-

THANK GOD ITS 12/11/11 ALREADY.

p/s: Contoh Karangan SPM. Maaf, haha -.-

It's the little things,

2011-11-05T17:46:00.000+08:00

One fine night, when we were in the car.

"Nama you start huruf 'R' kan. Nama i start huruf 'S',"
"Then?"
"So anak kita kena start huruf 'T' lah hehe"
"Alaa susah kot 'T'. Tak banyak pilihan."
"Tukiman?"
"Hahahaha"
"Tamam pun boleh. Perempuan boleh letak Tamimi hahaha"
"Hahahaha sengaaal. How about erm, Thaqif?"
"Ohh nice jugak kan. Tahir taknak? Nanti ada cucu kita suruh dia letak nama Faizal. Jadi Faizal Tahir"
"Hahahahahaha sengal. I love you."
"I love you too."

Haha. Tetiba teringat. Kelakar. Those were the days :)

November dreams,

2011-11-01T22:22:00.000+08:00

Millions trillions zillions of infinite thanks to Adam and Yuppie for coming over at my place and kidnapped me for a lunch treat earlier today. FYI i am so broke right now (you know you don't want to see my wallet,man) so i need to reserve my car fuel for balik kampung this Thursday. Yes i am on my 'Gardenia diet' for almost a week now oh well Gardenia diet simply brings the meaning 'a diet where you can only consume 2 slices of white Gardenia bread with kaya spread PER DAY'. Which explains the first point mentioned earlier. But mom just called me and told that she will bank in some cash by tomorrow morning HEHEHE :3

Thats Yuppie! Say hi, hehe.

This can also proves how happy i am with my current life these days that my cheeks both have already shown a rapid increase in its diameter. Both. Nevermind, i should be thankful to God for not letting me starving, no? Okay then, go breed yourself freely dear cheeks, dear tummy, dear arms, dear everywhere. Aku kan dah memang slim *flips tudung*

TAK KELAKAR OKAY T__T

Anyways, thanks again Adam & Yuppie. You made my 1/11/2011 already hehe. To all readers, Happy November! :)

Err, hi?

2011-10-30T14:47:00.001+08:00

I wanna start to write again in this blog, since my new blog was like a major failure to me and my fingers are all like numbed each time i try to write in it. So that explains why im reopening my blog again, and since like almost everyone is so mad to me and keep asking why i'm deleting this blog. Yeah true that, i really deleted this blog but thank god Blogger gave this opt of 90 days period of recovering option if i decided to undo the deletion.

So yeah, this blog is on back again. For zillions of time, haha. But its nearly a month i haven't updated anything and there's like 3743648374934 things happened to me during my hiatus hence a brain freeze. I don't know if its still relevant to blog about them cuz as for me, the stories are all already went 'lemau' and dah tak syok to write about something thats already happened for like, 4 weeks ago? Gheez.

Sorry for any inconvenience selama mana blog ni takda. I miss blogging too, its like already in ze blood yknow? Hehe. Im not promising any new posts in the next few weeks due to the finals i will be facing in no time. But maybe if i already have my pictures from friends when i was attending the OctTwtFest at Digi HQ, Subang (I met a loooot of cool people there including Hanis Zalikha omjay) and Shazwani Hamid's tea party, i think i HAVE TO blog bout em hehe :)

Anyways, i'd just had ze craziest hangout with Arif, Mira & Aizat last Friday. How i wish i can blog about it here but too bad i can't, for some concrete reasons hahaha. And i met a friend in Cheras too, it was spontaneous cuz i was spending my Saturday yesterday driving around KL exploring the roads and places like mad (i was in stress back then haha). Sejak ada kereta ni, bila stress je drive. But its good cuz i think i had upgraded my built-in GPS in brain a lot hehe.

Till then. Take care everyone! xx

Nah gambar pengubat rinduew hahaha. Behind me is the ever gorgeous Shazwani Hamid :)

We will never know when,

2011-10-07T13:26:00.000+08:00

I think i will take out a piece of paper, a pen, and list out all my emails, IDs & passwords for all online accounts ive created throughout my life. Myspace, Facebook, Twitter, Blogger, Tumblr, Ruumz, Nuffnang, Flickr, Google+, etc. Everything. And I'm gonna write a note at the bottom that says;

'Dear whoever that finds this when i am already leaving this life, please, delete all of the accounts of mine mentioned above. Your cooperation is expected, thank you in advance .'

I can't imagine having my friends and relatives writing on my Wall saying 'You'll be missed', 'May God be with you', 'Innanillah', 'Goodbye', 'Takziah' and whatever that relates to condolences for me one day. And i am not able to read all of them cuz yeah, id already gone that time. I can't see who's actually crying for me, i can't see who's actually realizing my absence. And perhaps, on that time there's actually someone that writes the truth he/she's been hiding from me when i was still alive. But being dead already, i can't read it. And i will never know, never.

And I can't imagine having people reading my blog and to know that i am no longer exist. I don't want them to read stories and ramblings of a dead people. My life has so much flaws and downs, i don't want to remind other people about it. But sometimes, i also want my blog to remain available, just to show the world that despite all the sorrows and hardships i had encountered in my life, i still had a perfect life once, in my own way. I have a lovely family who loves me and actually the ones i can't life w/o, awesome friends around me who are always there to help and listen, and also a guy that means the world to me (you know who you are). And imagine if i am no longer here right now, and while you are scrolling down my entries, you find this entry.

Wow, awkward.

This is just a sudden random thought, after knowing that one of my Facebook friend already passed away last night in a car crash. Seeing everyone in his friend list to write on his Wall stating condolences and stuff, saddens me. It would be nice if he knows how many people that actually care and feel his loss. May you rest in peace, Syamil Jorak. Al-Fatihah.

Shooting stars,

2011-10-05T19:41:00.000+08:00

The past few weeks weren't my best weeks. I had quite a lot of hard times, but surprisingly and thankfully, i survived. So everytime when the weekend approaches, i know im gonna use it wisely, every single second will be counted. Since i wasn't in a good mood for the whole week, i wanna rebuild my good mood again, so i decided to go back home in Batu Pahat this week . Only God knows how i miss Batu Pahat people so much that if only i could fly, i will absolutely fly to my hometown everyday just to spend the nights surrounded with all the people that i love. It makes me feel safe and not lonely :')

Ive been spending quite a time outside of the hostel. I rarely go back to the hostel early as i will go to somewhere else first with my classmates to just hang out and dine together. Thats my routine like almost everyday. We will try to discover new places to eat, or simply lepaking around haha yes im starting to loiter now haha but in a good and healthy way lah not like infront of Pavilion wearing supras and raybans and taking pictures in the toilet using DSLR or what hahahah. And for weekends, i usually go back home every 2 weeks, and any weekends spent in KL will be filled with meet ups with friends on Saturdays. The cycle continues every week up until now :)

I just want to balance up my current life. I dont want to be like 'katak bawah tempurung' to not meeting ppl or going places and have fun. I dont want to only stuffed myself with studies and books and assignments pressure. But in the same time i also dont want to like, 'lalai' or too preoccupied with 'lagha' things too much. I hope i can balance both and can always maintain a good relationship with Him. Without His blessings, i won't be having everything that i have now. All praises go to my dearest Lord, Allah s.w.t. I love you :)

Motif just nak cakap minggu ni balik BP, tu je. Hahaha :P

p/s: Finals in 4 weeks! Berdebo okay jantung T.T

September dreams,

2011-10-01T21:39:00.000+08:00

Its finally October, alhamdulillah. September in overall had done more harm than good to me, well in term of my personal life, or love life to be more precise -__- But to look at the brighter side, it gives me a new hope in building a new relationship for me after this. Well, i already said to myself earlier that im not gonna stick myself to another guy after this. Im not going to be a part of anybody's heart anymore, at least for the time being. I have a lot of other more important responsibilities to be put on my both shoulders, enough with what i already had in the past. Its time to be more focused on my still blurry future. I should place both my feet back on the reality world, and shoot all opportunities.

Reminiscing the past, its been a real roller-coaster ride for my love life. A lot of new characters appeared out of all sudden -__- And the ones who i already dumped into the dustbin and erased in my diary, suddenly made their magic and being visible again in front of me. Everything had left me wondered, what is God trying to tell me this time? Zzzz enough about this, lets move on to my studies matter. So far i think i did well for my mid-term exam, the paper marks had said it all, alhamdulillah for that yeayy :D BUT, i need to work extra hard to pull off my carry marks cuz i didn't get much on the assignments/presentations part. Whoever follows my Twitter will exactly know what i had faced throughout finishing the assignments. My advise, please know wisely with whom you are comfortable to work with for your group work courses, or else you'll be risking your own carry marks when u have someone with a superlazy & annoying attitude as your groupmate. Serik dah weh -__-

Gah i found my life even duller nowadays. No time to have fun fun fun. I need to rebalance my life. And get closer to God. I miss everyone. I wanna go home and eat mom's cooking. I want my bed. Okay i can't see any clear points or purpose of making this entry maka bye.

Oh yea, welcome October! :)

p/s: Thanks for everything, dear Lord. Don't let my spirit slips and flies away from me. Help me to make things easier, thanks again :)

Its harder than i thought,

2011-09-26T21:41:00.000+08:00

How to make a better day?

2011-09-25T01:13:00.000+08:00

I am just really pissed off with almost everyone, everything. I'm missing my old life. I just want to run into the woods, find a hole and jump into it so that i can travel through the time and go back to my childhood days. I miss having everyone feeling pleasant with my presence, having everyone to smile together whenever i smile, having everyone wanting to take care of me, having everyone worrying about my tears whenever im crying. I miss having everything nice. I don't have to worry a thing.

But here i am, growing up. Nothing feels the same again. I'm missing all the people that i love. All the good times i had before. Time changes everything.

p/s: Hello week 9. Please be good. Bismillahirahmanirahim.

Unconscious soul,

2011-09-22T23:21:00.001+08:00

One week. One freaking week.

Yes that is probably be the shortest relationship ive ever been into so far. Since i have nothing to do with Khaidhir anymore for the past months, i tried to move on. Its not like i was finding a better replacement for him, in fact Khaidhir is irreplaceable for me. No any other guys had treated me like he did, and he's like the most sincere guy i ever met in life, and to tell you the truth, i still love him.

That's why i find it hard for me to forget him, so i try to meet someone new to at least, keep me distracted from thinking of him. There's a reason why we split up but its too personal to be told here. Only very close friends know bout it. So back to the story, i met this one guy. We've known each other since i worked in Parkson. Yeah, he worked at the same place with me but we rarely talk to each other back then as we were at different departments. But he added me on Facebook and had a few chat sessions. But only that, nothing more.

Since the broke up, we're getting closer. I never have those special feelings towards him, but he did. And last week, he proposed me to be his girlfriend. And i was like, seriously? Cuz really, i never thought of having a relationship with him. But i dont know why, i felt that its maybe a good way for me to forget my ex, so i accepted (yeahh -__-).

But we lasted for a week only -.- Reason? He can't withstand long distance relationship. When i told him i won't be home in BP this week, he sulked. And being a loser in persuading ppl, i let him be it that way. Pergilah kau pujuk diri sendiri, tak kose aku. Plus, he is a hot-tempered person. Lambat reply text, memang kena maki lah. And another thing, he always try to find a way to touch me, or kiss me. Please, lelaki macam ni tak payah hidup pun takpe kot.

And some of you must be thinking 'Kalau dah tau dia cenggitu kenapa nak couple dengan dia lagi?' Well, i must say that guys selagi dia tak dapat apa dia nak, selagi tu lah mulut dia manissssssssssss sangat dan berkelakuan comel dan gentleman sentiasa sebab nak kita cair dengan dia. Tapi bila dah dapat, fuuuuuuh mencabar kesabaran. So i'd learnt my lesson. I only managed to tahan for a week only before i decided to leave him (this is the most exciting part haha) tapi paling bengang sebab bila bukak Facebook, dia pulak yang block kita?!? Patutnya aku lah yang block kau ngek -__-"

But tipulah kalau tak sedih. Cuz its like nearly impossible for us to be friends again like the old times. But its sokay I'm fine. At least i'm single again and always ready to mingle X) So that's my story for now. Worth the one-week waiting for new blog update right? Ha ha ha. Kbai.

:')

p/s: But i know bukan semua lelaki macam tu. Just that the good ones dah macam makin pupus. Where art thou?

Sunshines,

2011-09-19T00:43:00.001+08:00

Do you know what am i doing right now? Do you? Yes i am actually memorizing my lines for my so-called Economics presentation tomorrow but you know what? Screw it. Im just gonna cross my fingers and goreng whatever that comes across my mind during the presentation. Remember, a good level of confidence with a very fine and smooth hand gestures that comes in package with all those superb facial expressions of yours are what you really need to convince people about things youre talking about, although the contents are barely there. You just need to look very convincing, and pooff! high marks for you hahaha how i wish getting high marks for presentations is as simple as that. But the truth is, it is not. Sigh sigh sigh.

Oh anyway I'm in Bangsar already. Yes, i was spending my whole weekend in Batu Pahat, attending open house, makan-makan with my former colleagues, watched Johnny English with cousin and brother, quite a weekend. Spent some time with him too. Well, someone who i am accidentally dating with right now, haha boleh pulak macam tu. But nah nothing's between us really. Keeping the gap as friends only. But yes i miss him now. I wonder why...

p/s: Nothing's to be submitted, mid-term's over. Yeay!

Inhale,exhale.

2011-09-11T19:55:00.001+08:00

Class starts again tomorrow. Its already my 8th week here, and sadly i still feel like nothing. I still feel alone, i dont have friends that i can talk to freely about almost everything like i can always do with my old friends back in my school & foundation times. Everyone is practically not at the same brain wavelength as mine, but thank God at least i have Wanda with me. She's my roommate and the only reason why she's the one who gets the closest to me is the fact she's only 20. Beza setahun je so it didn't make much difference dari segi attitude and thinking just that of course she is more matured than me. Another one is Nad, my roommate too. She's already 23 yet she is such an open minded person & we can talk about nearly everything. But still, sebab dia dah 23 so i still respect her by not using vulgar words i used to use with my old friends haha. But its good, to see on the brighter side, it helps me to speak properly and become more 'sopan santun' in terms of adat berbual, haha. Damn, screw my Manglish its getting worse haha -.-

Going to disappear for some days again this week, a lot of works need to be settled before i go back to Johor Bahru this Thursday insyaAllah. I'm still in my mid-term exams week, still have Econs, Marketing, English & Arabic papers to kill, 2 Maths quizzes & a bunch of assignments to be submitted. Everything within this week. Phew. God bless.

Meanwhile, i finally decided to plant something in my room. Being a girl who never likes gardening, i siap call my dad just to get the right instructions on how to plant the grass properly hahaha! Enough said, i did it wrongly but ayah said its okay, rumput je pun, boleh je hidup. So let's just see how it goes in the next few days aite? :3

In overall, things are getting better actually. Alhamdulillah.

Plain papers.

2011-09-08T15:01:00.002+08:00

Hidup membujang memang membosankan. Dan aku baru je memasuki fasa mengeluarkan semua stok instant food dari dalam bagasi. Eceh, bagasi. Begitu skema hahaha. Menu makan tengah hari harini ialah bihun sup instant. Yang sangat tak sedap. SANGAT. Ada sedikit sesalan disitu. Tapi sekali sekala layan perasaan makan tepi tingkap merenung ke masa hadapan, tak sedar tetiba teremo sendiri. Dengan status diri ini yang sedang berhadapan dengan mid term exam, dan paper Accounts yang berkelakuan sumbang terhadap aku tempoh hari, aku memang sangat emo lunch tadi haha.

Minggu ini membosankan, rakan-rakan semua dah sibuk berorientasi di universiti masing-masing, sudahlah kebanyakannya ditempatkan di universiti-universiti yang beratus kilometer jauh daripada aku, maka makin berkuranganlah member nak ajak layan maple lepas ni. Sudah 6 minggu di sini, aku masih belum jumpa lagi sahabat yang betul-betul serasi bersama sehati sejiwa berdansa dengan aku. Yes, i am still holding the 'lone ranger' title, atau dalam bahasa kasarnya, forever alone =.=

Teringat pulak masa raya lepas, aunty aku ada pesan suruh cari boyfriend kat sini. Kalau boleh, yang berkereta. So senanglah pergi balik kelas ada orang hantar, untung-untung lunch pun aku tak payah keluarkan duit sebab dah ada orang belanja huahuahua. TAPI, takpelah. Aku tak berminat lagi nak get into any relationships since yeah, ah malas nak elaborate -.- Plus, aku bukan jenis yang nak couple sebab nak ada kereta lah apa lah, LRT Monorail KTM ada apadehal (eceh). And kononnya, bila ada boyfriend kat sini takdelah hidup aku pathetic/hopeless sebegini rupa. Nama je duduk tengah KL, ada macam-macam tempat boleh hangout, tapi bila weekends je peram dalam bilik baca buku T_T So bila ada boyfriend, bolehlah dia bawak aku jalan-jalan, layan nafsu membeli-belah aku, etc. But why am i so not interested with all those so-called 'fun' things? I am acting completely plain and dull nowadays i don't even understand my own self anymore zzz.

I have enough distractions already, so i can't see any benefits of adding another one to the list. Plus, i think this is the things that i need to sacrifice to get good results in my studies. Takda boyfriend pun tengoklah, paper Accounts haritu pun macam ada harapan nak fail. So sad lah liddis T___T

I need more spirit and strength, moga Allah permudahkan insyaAllah. Have fun this weekend, guys! :)

Things just happen,

2011-09-02T06:05:00.000+08:00

(Pam Tayar @ Shell Jln Tg Laboh, BP)

I just can't believe its September already. I just can't believe I've actually stayed in Kuala Lumpur for almost a month now. I can't even believe that we'd left Ramadhan for like, 3 days ago. I felt like it was just yesterday when i cried myself to sleep as i was so homesick and got tired with the hectic college schedule and stuff. I felt it was just yesterday when i started my 6 months-long break last March. I just don't know why time is consumed really fast nowadays. I can barely take a long, deep breath when suddenly everything juggles before me and in a blink of eye, everything just had happened without me noticing it -_-

And visiting late grannies and relatives who already left us earlier, makes me think that life, is not race, cause nobody will win as different people have their own different finishing points. Its the journey between it that matters. And we have so little time left for us to do so many things while we are still alive. There's a lot more to be discovered on this land of Allah SWT, there's a sea of knowledge out there that is still not learnt by us. and a lot more of preparations that are needed to be done for the hereafter. Do we carry enough with us? Do we really prepared to face our Almighty Creator? I ask the same thing to myself, and the answer is not comforting for me too.

May everyone will be blessed with more years to live, more time to make more sujjuds, more space to give chances to self to repent, and more faith and patience to withstand all those whispers from the Lucifer and his army of Jahannam. Let's make this September to be much better than the last year's insyaAllah. I'll be having my mid-term exams starting next week, and some of the assignments that need to be handed in by this month so I'm expecting a busier month after this. An advance apology to all if this blog is being on a hiatus for a long time, i still have my life out there to be focused on :)

Nevertheless, please pray for me friends. It doesn't matter if its about my health, my wealth, my mental, my physical, my spiritual, etc, i just need those prayers for me to keep on track, dalam erti kata lain, pendorong semangat hehe :)

p/s: Not forgetting my friends who will be starting their degree this month, i would like to say 'Good Luck & All the Best!' to every each of you. Harap Allah permudahkan urusan kita bersama-sama dalam menuntut ilmu dibawah keredhaanNya, Ameen! :D

Selamat Hari Raya! :D

2011-08-31T01:39:00.002+08:00

Haha ignore my silly ugly face, was too excited actually hehe. Minnal Aidil Wal Faizin, Happy Eid Mubarak 1432H to all my muslim brother and sisters who's celebrating it all over the world! Have a nice one ♥

And to all of my friends and blog readers out there, Salam Aidilfitri from me and family. Minta ampun andai terkasar bahasa tersilap kata, andai ada perkara yang pernah dibuat yang telah menyinggungkan hati sesiapa, i am truely sorry for that. Trust me im just a normal human being that will never get escaped from doing mistakes. Again, i am verrrrry sorry, ikhlas ni :')

More pictures and raya update soon. Kalau.rajin.lah.ha.ha.ha :P ohhhh before i forgot, i would like to wish a Happy Independence Day to all Malaysians out there! 54 years already and still counting, InsyaAllah. Pray hard for peace in ze lovely country! Saya bangga jadi anak Malaysia :'D

p/s : Raya speech video coming soon. Probably will be uploaded tomorrow ngeh ngeh ngeh :P

New shell,

2011-08-28T06:30:00.000+08:00

So how do you like my new layout? Blog pun nak raya jugak heheheh :P

Constant sunrise,

2011-08-27T06:33:00.018+08:00

I'm home, again! Hehe its been a week since i last updated this blog. I am so sorry but i'm just too busy with college stuffs and mid-term exam is approaching soon after the Eid break so yeah. But seriously, i really can't explain on my 24/7 constant existence on Twitter despite the busyness hahahah. Twitter is just, erm, inevitable heheh.

Ramadhan is leaving us. How many of us realize that time flies real fast during this Holy month? Surely we are aware that the month won't be waiting for us, we are the ones who need to chase after it - to seek the blessings and benefits that worth a thousand months. SubhanAllah, how generous our God is towards us. He really wants His servants to be in Jannah, to be near to Him. InsyaAllah He will grant us all the promises He promised earlier, as long as we are being really sincere and humble in doing all the Do's, be it the wajib ones or the sunat ones. Every deed will be rewarded :)

Eid ul Fitr? Honestly since my grandpa passed away, the spirit of celebrating Hari Raya among us in the family had nearly vanished and scrubbed away. I don't have any kampungs to visit, except for my aunts and uncles' cribs that happen to be situated in kampung areas too. Those are the only places where i can still see and feel the real Hari Raya vibe, with all those pelitas placed around the wooden houses and kids playing bunga api and mercun everywhere. At some places, you can still see the villagers gathered at the 'balai raya' and prepare the must-haves in Hari Raya- dodol, lemang, ketupat, etc. Ya Allah seriously i am dying for that kind of experiences cuz i never actually spend my 'malam raya' anywhere other than my own brick house, in the middle of the concrete jungle -_-

Last year's Eid. Yes, my family TAK PERNAH had those theme-ed / same colored clothes for raya. Another fact of my family's way celebrating Eid.

And yes, i never, ever, reti to weave ketupats in my whole freakin life! In fact, i never even tried to make one. Pathetic right? I know......sigh. Plus the fact that i still need to make revisions for exams during raya this year is just an another add-on reasons for me to not have much time to learn all these classic skills. This is really annoying since id already been stucked with this same situation last year, when i needed to revise for my coming final exam for my Asasi programme. Thank god the result turned out good or else i should have regretted my whole life for rejecting a lot of open house invitations just to make sure i'll not leave the house w/o studying. Darn, imma geek B-| (this smiley should appear as a 'straight-faced specky' in case you dont get my point here -_-) And i bet i'll be doing the same thing this year. Nevermind, raya tetiap tahun ada. Exam tak boleh ulang-ulang. Unless youre going to repeat papers which is a big nightmare for students like me T_T

Well, i guess that's all for this time. I think the next post will be my first day Raya post since i'll be busying myself with Hari Raya preparations pulak lepasni hahah. Theres walls to be painted, curtains to be hanged, vases of flowers to be arranged, a house that is needed to be cleaned all over oh yeah i actually love the preparation part more than the celebration. The smell of freshly painted walls, aaaaah really nice. Can't wait :D

P/s : Raya-raya jugak, jangan lupa manfaatkan malam-malam terakhir Ramadhan ini. Who knows this will be your last? Semoga dipanjangkan umur untuk bertemu Ramadhan kembali tahun depan, Ameeeen :')

Embarking soul,

2011-08-20T04:05:00.001+08:00

Being home is great. I never feel this relief when im able to go back home and say hi to my supercomfy bed, aaaah that feeling is just amazing. Probably the fact that im already stucking myself in Kuala Lumpur for 2 weeks can be one of the reasons why. I am not homesick actually, im just erm, lonely. Sounds pitiful right? But that's the truth. I have a lot of people around me everyday, but yet there's still that silence in here, in my heart and mind. Its maybe because i dont have anyone here that ive already known for long before entering the college. So if i face any personal problems, i just have no one to turn to. Phone calls, web chats, and texts are just different. I need to converse face-to-face. At least, my words won't be easily interpreted wrongly. Well, i'm quite good in making body gestures and facial expressions, just to make sure people are really understanding my stories or thoughts. And i can't do that when im on a phone call/texting somebody, thats why i need real talks. And im the person who is boring to be texted with, trust me. Exception to people whom i am closed with, they can simply understand every word that i'm trying to tell w/o the need to put smileys and stuff at the end of every sentences. Friends are always being magical in their own way, im kinda impressed by that.

So far, Batu Pahat is the only place where i can find the calmness and peace ive lost back in Kuala Lumpur. Ah, maybe it isn't the right time yet. Maybe im still being a stranger to my new life. Maybe i just haven't fit in it yet. I need time, ya Allah. Please ease everything up, make my path clearer. Ameen.

Going back on Sunday. Geek mode ON.

p/s: Decision has been made. InsyaAllah my current college is still the best for me. Doakan :)

In between,

2011-08-17T22:55:00.001+08:00

BBA(Hons) in Islamic Banking, UiTM Dungun, Terengganu. //

BBA(Hons) in Islamic Finance, UniKL City Campus, Kuala Lumpur.

Which one to choose? Seriously tak tahu. Peluang insyaAllah lebih banyak kalau pergi ke UniKL, macam yang aku pernah bagitau kat entri sebelum ni (about the INCIEF, Bank Negara, Morocco/Abu Dhabi things) tapi taktau kenapa hati ni tak habis-habis pilih UiTM. I thought UiTM is no longer dihatiku -.-"

Parents? "Ikut Raisya lah". Sigh zzzz T.T

Apa-apa pun, Alhamdulillah sebab dimurahkan rezeki dgn tawaran ni. Cuma ya, aku jadi makin buntu skrg. Help needed here pretty please :|

Scratched records,

2011-08-16T09:28:00.002+08:00

Dah 2 hari (termasuk hari ni) aku tak pergi kelas. Semalam sebab pagi-pagi aku kena asthma attack, after yearsssss asthma aku tak datang, tiba-tiba dia pilih hari itu untuk buat comeback yang sangat tak diundang oleh diri ini =.= Ingatkan nak skip kelas pagi je, sekali tertidur dan terbangun pukul 2 petang =.= So technically i've missed my Econs quiz, but sir is kind enough to give me an exemption so it will be postponed till i am healthy enough to come and sit for the quiz, yeay ^^v

About today's reason, i went to Hospital Kuala Lumpur (HKL) last night. My roommate suddenly collapsed and we rushed her to the hospital. Thankfully she had told me about this disease she is recently diagnosed with, called 'SLE' or lupus, an autoimmune disorder. This is when your own immune system cannot detect and identify your own body tissues and muscles, hence the attack to your own body cells. This can cause your muscles,joints and tissues to ache and inflame. When she told me about this, she even showed me how easily her hair falls, sekali sapu memang segenggam luruh. True fact, i am not exaggerating.

I was at the hospital until 4.30am, and with my own low health state, my energy bar was really draining and right after i arrived at my room, i collapsed too =.= So with my unhealthy condition plus the tiredness gained from the hours of standing at the hospital plus the lack of sleeping time (i only managed to sleep for 2 hours which is not normal for me), i found it hard to go to my 8am class today. Sorry sir, but i just can't T.T

But it is really killing me to know that after 8am, i still can't put myself to sleep again, hence this update. I am updating from my bed, like yeah my eyes are soooo wide like an owl now but my whole body aches like hell i can't even stand on my own feet -.-" Plus, Kuala Lumpur pagi-pagi dah panas so i am really not comfortable with the idea of sleeping on bed when the hot sun streaks are actually directly pointed to my nose.

Only now i really hope that my lecturers are actually following my blog and read everything i had wrote here, so i wont have to bring myself to each of their cubicles tomorrow and explain to them my whole fat reason (since UniKL memang tak terima any sort of excuse letters except MCs zzz) for not attending their classes.

Life, will never be easy. Bukan setiap hari kita akan diberikan nikmat yang kebiasaannya memang sentiasa ada untuk kita sepanjang masa. Kadang kala, nikmat tu ditarik. And only then you will find yourself small and weak. Only then you realise life will not always be beautiful. But this is how we learn to survive, and to appreciate life more. Alhamdulillah the heart is still strong to withstand the holes and cracks on this road. Allah pun pernah cakap sakit tu penghapus dosa kecil, so its not good for me to complain nak nak lagi bulan puasa sekarang ni kan. Semoga Allah lebih permudahkan urusan esok hari, Ameen.

Oh ya, doakan jugak untuk kawan saya tu. Hopefully she can be discharged soon. Im already missing her :')

Little birds,

2011-08-14T15:18:00.001+08:00

Do you know how it feels like to let go of someone you love for a long time, just to see them happy? You know you can't be just friends with them, because you know how much youre going to hurt yourself, seeing them meeting someone else that can make them laugh better. You know things won't be the same again, as you just cant find youself in them anymore; your spot has been taken over by someone else.

How irony it is to make others happy when you have to pay it with your tears. They must be worth your tears, no?When they leave, there's a vacant inside you. The warmth is no longer there, just coldness. And only then you know how much they mean to you, and how much you can't live without them. You just want them back, cuz they just know the art of making you smile and laugh, and you just, hmm, love them.

I am not as confident as i look, i do have scars, i do bleed. I do have conflicts. I have my own stories. I am no superhuman.

p/s : Econs quiz tomorrow and Arabic test next Wednesday. Wish me luck guys :)

Future planning,

2011-08-13T01:46:00.000+08:00

Its already 3 weeks since the first day i came to UniKL. How fast time can actually flies! So far, i am doing good with my studies Alhamdolillah. Allah has made it simple for me and i hope this feeling lasts till the last day of my 9th semester final exam (ive been highlighting the same thing over and over again no? sorry ;p). Since all the subjects are new for me except for the English class, i must say that BBA is not bad after all. I honestly don't have that sense of regretting for taking this course, turning to something that is absolutely an alien to me. Instead, i feel really grateful and blessed to be given the chance to learn something new, something fresh, different from the ones ive used to learn for years back then. I never find my scientific knowledge as a big waste now since i don't have to apply any of it for my degree, but i always tell myself how lucky i am to have this chance to explore the sea of 'ilm even broader.

Since i have made a very big decision in my life path, i must redo and rearrange my future plans. Well for me, i am now taking my first degree in Islamic Finance. InsyaAllah i will finish the course by 2014,which in the next 3 years from now. As been told by our course coordinator, to guarantee a good position in future job prospect, its advisable to take the masters degree straight away after the graduation. For my course, INCIEF is the place. INCIEF is an international university specifically for islamic finance ONLY, developed by Bank Negara. If i can maintain my grades no less than 'B' in all subjects throughout the years, i am eligible to receive the Bank Negara scholarship to do my masters there for 18 months. And who wouldn't want that? C'mon, Bank Negara kotttt! Since the day my coordinator told us about this, my spirit is burning even wilder. Like, i really tell myself 'Raisya, please don't give any rooms for mistakes. B or A and thats it. No excuses!' Its like the Bank Negara image is really, really hunting me from that day onwards haha.

So insyaAllah with God's will, i really want to hold a masters degree by the age of 24, since the path is already there. I just need to study hard, the grades are all that matters. And by having that globally-recognized certificate by INCIEF, i can apply for any positions in this field around the world. And guess what, since i really love to go aboard, i want Bank Negara to send me to Abu Dhabi or Morocco for my internship. If the lady luck is with me, i can straight away work there and build a lot of assets before i go back home to serve the country. Sounds dreamy, but nothing is impossible. And yes, it all starts with a belief in our ability to achive the goals we dream of complishing. May Allah always be with me as He is the one who will bless me with strength and confidence in facing this bumpy roads. He will assist me, i have faith on Him. And i really hope this path is under his blessings. Alhamdulillah, i'm doing my part as a muslim by learning deeper about Islam through the subjects. Another jihad for me, semoga diberkati, Ameen.

"Goals are dreams we convert to plans and take action to fulfill " - Zig Ziglar

Summary of the week thou its only Thursday today.

2011-08-11T22:28:00.003+08:00

Things didn't seemed to go well this week. Well, most of the time. Firstly, i am so not liking my timetable. Yes its cool to have only 3 days of classes every week, where you can have your weekend extended to 4 days. Its heaven, really. Especially when you have so much to do - revisions, assignments, tutorials and stuff, you really can't create the 'i dont have much time' excuse to the lecturers cuz they obviously are aware with our timetable. I have enough time to study so far, at least i can finish my revision everyday by 12am and after that, its up to me to use the extra time to sleep or simply take my drugs - Twitter, but so far i always opt for the latter hehe. But looking at the darker side, 4 days of weekend will make me to have the urge to go home every week, or worse, the urge to go lepakking around Kuala Lumpur hence the waste of time and money. I must build a really big, high, concrete bullet-proof wall between me and my high demand wants. I must not spend too much on unnecessary things e.g new handbags (biggest weakness -_-)

Secondly, i dislike some of my classmates. Some of them are being way too loud and immature that sometimes i feel like taping up their mouths -.- But i dont hate them either, the feeling is just there whenever they are so noisy when the lecturers are around. I find it rude. But most of them are really kind when it comes to helping others. Maybe it will take some time for me to cope with this. Nah, i dont really care about it except when i have my menses lol. The guys, hmm not much to say bout them as i dont really care about them either, except for some of them who actually said hi to me and actually talked to me. Well, there are so fewwww of them trust me. I dont talk to guys that much here.

But above all, there are still some small joys i'd encountered within these few days back then. Somehow, people from my past well not the bad one but by here i mean the people from my working place are like coming back to me. Yes, we started to contact each other more often lately. Via facebook, twitter, even ym. So good to know they still remember me, and wanting me to work there again in the future hehe. InsyaAllah.

And yes, Ayah posted some serunding for me last Monday but i only collected it just now at the pak guard's. I felt so touched when i saw the parcel, i can imagine how cute Ayah is when he's sending the serunding at the post office haha thank you Ayah, you made me smile all day long after a hectic day of college stuffs. I can eat properly during Sahor after this :)

The only recent photo of me in UniKL. UniKL nya pun tak nampak zzz oh meet my new friend, Shazana Amira. A combined name of my two besties Shazana Liyana and Amiratullyana hehe. Oh i miss them both so much. Planning to break fast together this weekend. Harap jadi insyaAllah :)

A week passed by,

2011-08-07T22:33:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum guys :)

So last Thursday i went back to my hometown to simply do my fasting there with my family, and not forgetting to break my fast with Ibu's famous dishes. But turned out Ayah who did the cooking instead hehe. He made Asam Pedas and sayur kangkung goreng for us and yessssss they were so delicious! Thanks Ayah, you shouldve joined Masterchef hehehehe :P

I was in Batu Pahat for four days and it was only then i realized how i miss my hometown so much. It made me feel like going home every weekend after this haha :'D So on Sunday (today), i finally get my footprints back in Kuala Lumpur with Nad, my girlfriend from TIGS heheh. Since we haven't met for yearssss so we decided to break fast together. And Chawan is the place :D

Its my second visit to Chawan and yes it still never fails to make me leave the place with a happy tummy! Great food, great friend, Alhamdulillah, another happy fasting day for me :)

Never be sad for what is over, just be glad that it was once yours.

2011-08-04T22:59:00.001+08:00

It did happened.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they’re right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.

I was born the day I met you, lived a while when you loved me, but died a little when we broke apart. I will always pray for your happiness and success, be it in your studies and your new life as well.

But the love, will never fades. And that's my promise. Thanks for everything Khaidhir, you had taught me a lot.

Sudahlah duhai hati, tak guna menangis lagi.

p/s: Im really living a brand new life, no? New degree life, new independent living, new friend circles, new environment, new status. InsyaAllah i can get through this.

I dont live to please your needs ;)

2011-08-01T22:43:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum guys :D

Feeling a tad guilty for updating my blog in a middle of my study time, but sokay take this as my Take 5 session alright? Been dumping my head into these thick books since evening and i tell you, finance is a seriouz businezz mannnnn. Maybe there's no more biologically-weird terms and names, ridiculously long maths equations and over the top chemical reactions to memorize, but hey its a no play-play situation when you HAVE to memorize every single terms and laws and principles in accounts, marketing, economics, finance and management, not forgetting to learn Arabic from scratch. Memorize or die, thats the rule i am aware of so far haha.

Already received a lot of assignments but Alhamdulillah i manage to settle all of them in time. Maybe its just the basics that make me feel a bit easy to understand but i hope this feeling will last till the end of 9th semester haha Ameeennn :)

Okay i guess its already a 'Take 10' now -.-" need to be fully energized again thanks to Red Bull hahaha serious sheez this drink is really helping me since my Puncak Alam days. Well, the fact that i am a heavy sleeper hmmm so yeah hahahahaha. Oh and i think its not too late to wish all of you a Happy Ramadhan Kareem! Let's us all hope for the best this year and may our good deeds will be paid off with awesome rewards from Him insyaAllah. Aim for Jannah! X)

SORRY GAMBAR ANNOYING SEBAB TAKDA GAMBAR LAIN HAHAHA KBYE.

Virtual hugs

2011-07-30T22:27:00.000+08:00

@Stadium Bukit Jalil, 28th July 2011

Having fun with the Polaroid app hahahahaha Happy weekend guys! :D

Hitam Kuning.

2011-07-29T15:34:00.000+08:00

Kanak-kanak yang teruja nak tengok bola walaupun takda tiket HAHA

One of the many many cool banners hehh

Rakan baru ecehceh hahaha

And these guys are absolutely awezomeeeee! Stood there for like hourrrsss just to listen to their beats :)

Sorry muka burok tapi kitew nak letak jugak gamba kitew pakai jersey tak kirew tak kirew.

Despite our lose in yesterday's match, i am still proud with our Tigers' performance, especially our goalkeeper Khairul Fahmi who really did a great job in covering our goal. A big clap to Safee Sali too for our single goal, i nearly drowned into tears when i saw his face after scoring the goal, full of satisfaction and gratefulness i must say :D Kunanlan? He was like The Flash last night, he made running looks not tiring at all -.-" And Qiu Li... he looked more annoying and fatter zzzz. Eish semua players Singapore memang berdrama swasta even pelakon drama RTM1 pun tak seannoying diorang =.=

Okay enough about football, i'd actually already started my class last Wednesday. As i registered there a bit late, i skipped out the orientation week and 2 days of classes. When i first stepped in to my class ( it was the Academic Writing class that time), ALL eyes were on ME. I felt like doomed already at that moment, tak suka situation macam tu T_T Lepastu kena introduce diri sendiri pulakkkk zzzzz and i need to speak in English as well because of the foreign students in my class. But so far Alhamdulillah my lecturers are all nice and great, not forgetting my new friends in class IF21! Thanks sudi kawan dengan kitew budak kampong heuheuheu sorry i cant help myself haha.

Still, no more pictures of me at the class/campus cuz i am still not really blend with the people yet. Minggu depan insyaAllah dah boleh :)

From the deep.

2011-07-27T23:58:00.000+08:00

Semua orang tahu perangai aku macam mana. Semua tahu aku memang jenis frank, cakap susah nak lapik. Yes aku mengaku dulu aku sangat kuat mencarut, tah apahal tah, zaman nak up dulu kot. Zaman gampang. Zaman batak. Zaman rewmpitz. Zaman ape tah lagi. Memang zaman gelap. Belajar dulu pun main-main ja, enjoy nak lebih. Belajar malas tapi result nak gempak. Bila result macam sampah, dia punya frust tu mengalahkan orang yang betul-betul stay up nyala lampu minyak belajar sampai suboh. Kalau bab buang duit pulak, memang nombor satu. Tak sah kalau tak pergi lepak dengan member, tak mainlah warung tepi jalan. Paling cikai pun Kenny Rogers ke MFM. Baju madah nak branded. Bajet anak Sultan Brunei beli barang mahal. Tudung pun entah kemana masa tu. Rambut siap rebonding, nyaris je tak karatkan. Megah betul tayang aurat macam dah confirm masuk syurga padahal sembahyang pun berlubang-lubang, Quran pun bulan puasa je selak, tu pun surah-surah lazim je. Adab dengan mak bapak? Aku reti pulak nak beradab dengan diorang dulu. Memanjang bertegang urat dengan ibu. Dengan ayah asyik mintak duit je. Tak dapat duit, mulalah muka mencuka masuk bilik hentak kaki hempas pintu. Yes i admit i was not that good in the past. Memang teruk, i never proud with myself masa tu. Memalukan. Tak matang.

But as the time flies, aku berubah like, involuntarily. Mungkin pengaruh orang sekeliling, atau mungkin sebab usia yang makin tua, makin dekat dengan mati. Aku bukan nak kata sekarang ni aku dah bagus tahap alim ulama', tapi aku boleh cakap yang aku memang jauh lebih baik berbanding dulu. Tapi aku pun tahu masih banyak lagi cela yang aku belum ubatkan, banyak lagi kekurangan yang belum aku turap. Banyak sangat yang aku kena belajar balik, and yes, it takes time, and support.

So janganlah simply pandai nak kondem aku macam-macam sebab seriously, korang tak kenal aku yang dulu. Kalau aku yang sekarang ni pun korang dah cakap macam-macam, rasanya kalau korang jumpa aku lebih awal, aku dah jadi mangsa rejam korang agaknya. Pleaselah, give me some more time and space. I am trying to change, jangan buat aku rasa sia-sia dengan penghijrahan ni. Jangan buat aku putus asa, please. Sebab hati aku memang sangat fragile. Luar nampak ganas, tapi dalam ni hanya Allah je yang tahu. Hati aku senang goyah dengan rayuan syaitan, tapi orang sekeliling dan akal aku selalu selamatkan aku. Alhamdulillah for that.

Jangan pulak bila aku post benda ni, korang cakap aku cepat gelabah lah emo lah apa lah. Kalau aku nak emo pun rasanya tak salah kot. Semua org ada perasaan. Sebab hati aku ni memang jenis rapuh, aku cepat terasa, sedih and sakit hati bila dengar orang cakap bukan-bukan pasal aku. I may look tough outside but trust me its just a fake wall built by me to hide what i actually feel when people throw bad assumptions and put high expectations from me. Penat tau, penat. Sekarang ni aku just terpaksa telan je apa yang orang cakap pasal aku, act strong, and kuatkan hati. Allah takkan uji diluar kemampuan hamba-Nya, aku percaya sebab dah banyak onar yang aku dah lalui, ada tu yang aku rasa macam mustahil to survive through it, but here i am, still breathing.

Ya Allah, kuatkanlah hamba-Mu seorang ni. Mungkin aku tak layak untuk syurgaMu, tapi aku tak sanggup terbakar dalam nerakaMu. Buku pun baru pakai lagi, aku harap tahun ni kurang sikit kesan kotor dalam buku aku tu. InsyaAllah yours will be the same too, or even a lot better than me. Nothing's impossible, kekuatan aku hanya pada kepercayaan aku pada kuasa Dia. Dia yang Maha Mengetahui, yang lebih arif tentang aku daripada kau, kau, dan kau. So you guys out there yang belum pun benar-benar kenal aku luar dan dalam, please stop judging me mengkhinzir buta.

p/s: Bukan niat nak membuka pekung sendiri, tapi supaya orang yang membaca ni semuanya ambil iktibar. Janganlah jadi macam aku dulu, banyak sangat dosanya.

Spot the difference.

2011-07-25T23:55:00.001+08:00

Dari tingkap bilik R4202, UiTM kampus Puncak Alam

Dari tingkap bilik 704, Kolej Kediaman UniKL, Bangsar.

Alhamdulillah first day of college went well. Well, almost. Quite hectic when we need to rush between floors to settle up our documents needed for the full registration and the MARA thingy. And ended up im actually missing out one of the most important documents which is the Asasi transcript...of all the things, -.-" So insyaAllah i'll be dropping by at UiTM Shah Alam to collect my transcript there, and maybe just take a look around the places there to find a jersey for me to wear to Bukit Jalil this Thursday. FUN FUN FUN :P

Gambar hostel nanti-nantilah. Busy sangat sampai tak sempat nak kemas katil and meja study kang kantoi dengan mak lalalala BYE! :D

First steps.

2011-07-24T01:00:00.000+08:00

Kedatangan ke Kuala Lumpur disambut dengan hujan rahmat yang sangat lebat di sebelah petang. Alhamdulillah, semoga menjadi petanda rezeki yang melimpah juga dari Dia untuk saya di kota metropolitan ini :))

Malam tu stay Kajang and akhirnya dapat lepas kempunan makan satay kat sini. Kat mana lagi kalau bukan kat Hj Samuri kan hihi. Alhamdulillah, tidur tersenyum-senyumlah malam ni sebab perut happy ngee :P

Nanti cerita pasal hostel pulak okay? Overall, i am happy for now. I feel really blessed by Him. Thanks Allah for this opportunity, i cant ask for more :)

Till then, assalamualaikum ♥

New findings!

2011-07-22T00:31:00.000+08:00

Semalam jalan-jalan kat BP Mall dengan Sue, when we stopped by at the Living Cabin and went through all the things displayed in the shop. SubhanAllah banyak gila barang dah update semua omey omey sampai rambang mata nak beli apa. We spent like about an hour there (really haha) and finally came out with these two things. Yeah, dua je mampu sebab total cash yang dibawa bersama sebenarnya untuk dilaburkan ke Popular to buy a new set of stationaries, pencil box lama entah mana aku dah campak dengan calculator sekali takde hahaha. So as you can see in the picture, i bought a supercute vintage year planner for only RM7.90 *diesssss* where i can jot down everything about my activities and whereabouts throughout my days in college. There are also pages for shopping lists, wishlists, checkpoints and ticket/coupon scraps in it, which gives extra +99 points for this planner. Okay excited gila kot nak guna buku ni heheheheh.

And see that mirror? I bought it because eishhh perempuan mana je yang boleh hidup takda cermin? Nak check rambut, nak check tudung tegak ke tak, nak check mekap okay ke tak, nak check cili ada celah gigi ke tak etc. I bought the mirror sebab from my view, its design looks like it is belong to some fairytale princesses, dont you think so? I feel like Snow White whenever im using it, rasa macam nak tanya cermin tu 'Mirror mirror, who's the prettiest of them all?' hahaha :P

And yes, besides buying all those pens, pencils, highlighters, pencil box and stuff, i managed to get myself a new novel for me to read once i reach my college. I'm aware that it will be a looooong week for the first week there as theres too many adaptations going on at ze moment plus the fact that i need to get to know and 'collect' as many new friends as possible within the period. So i probably can use this novel to help me kill the slow-moving time. FYI, aku jarang beli novel Melayu. The first one was Ayat-Ayat Cinta, and erm this is actually my second one hahahaha. Its called Hantaran Kasih Tuhan by Noorfadzillah Omar. Aku tertarik dengan sinopsis belakang buku, dan tajuk novel yang menonjol dan masuk akal berbanding tajuk-tajuk novel yang lain -.-"

Esok baru shopping secara serius. Shopping list panjang gila, rasanya Ahad baru siap shopping ni zzz k bye assalamualaikum! :D

Modules in queue.

2011-07-21T04:47:00.000+08:00

Just for the record, so that i wont forget my big responsible of studying all these things from scratch.

Semester #1
- Writing for Academic Purposes
- Principles of Accounting
- Principles of Marketing
- Principles of Economics
- Business Maths
- Arabic 1
- Usul Fiqh
- Qawaid Fiqhiyyah

Semester #2
- Bahasa Kebangsaan
- Pengajian Islam
- Technopreneurship
- Co-curriculum 1

Semester #3
- Applied Statistics
- Speech Communication
- Managerial Finance
- Principles of Management
- Management Accounting
- Comparative Entrepreneurship
- Arabic 2

Semester #4
- Intermediate Arab 1
- Islamic Capital Market 1
- Business Law
- Shariah Rules in Business & Finance
- Islamic Economic & Finance 1
- Islamic Banking Operations

Let's just see if i can play well in this game this time. InsyaAllah aku mampu. I just need to trust myself and have faith in Allah :)

Switch.

2011-07-20T03:23:00.000+08:00

Final shots on my last day working yesterday :')

Officially a penganggur now but gonna hold the 'student' title again very very soon. Im coming to KL this Saturday already. Somehow, time does heal some worries and insecurities in me. I found myself already prepared for this. Thou i must always remind myself it wont be easy at all, but i'll just give it a shot this time. Really hope to be able to switch my science brain mode into accounts bankings finance econs and stuff. The truth is, i will never meet Biology, Chemistry and Physics again. Its funny to think that i wont be applying any of these for my degree. So im thinking of letting go of my books and kitabs (haha) since my brother wont be using it too :)

Then uhm i guess all i need to do now is to learn to start visualizing myself as a banker, dah tak boleh berangan jadi doktor hot macam Dr. Grey and dapat scandal mchottie mcm Dr Shepherd lol. See, God really works in mysterious ways. Never in my life i had thought that i would be ending up learning finance, i never get any signs or hints, not even a slightest clue of it. Life is full of surprises, no?

I love you Allah. This roller coaster ride will be going to worth every penny, right? I have faith in you dear Lord ;) ♥

Jalan baru.

2011-07-19T02:26:00.000+08:00

Tuah hayam nampak di kaki, tuah aku?

Terima kasih MARA, terima kasih UniKL. Terima kasih Allah atas pemberian ini. Aku janji, lepasni aku akan kurangkan bermain and jadi lebih focus. Sebab apa yang aku bakal belajar ni, memang benda-benda yang sangat baru dan semacam 'stranger' untuk aku. Takpelah, dah rezekinya disini kan? Mungkin Dia nak aku belajar untuk bersusah dahulu untuk dapat apa yang aku mahu dalam future aku. Mungkin Dia taknak aku selesa lagi dalam comfort zone aku (in this case, my comfort zone is the 'science field'). Dia nak aku belajar untuk berusaha dan sedarkan aku yang bukan semua rezeki datang bergelek. Bergolek is so cliche hahaha.

So lepasni kena belajar jangan cepat mengalah dan jangan merungut sangat kalau things go wild and bad sampai rasa nak terjun KB Mall. Success comes to those who are persevere. Aku nak cuba kikis habis habit aku yang kadang-kadang suka merungut dan cepat sakit hati dan moody bila mula stress dengan belajar. Aku akan dekatkan diri lagi dengan Dia, kurangkan berfoya (er dont read this as in clubbing/drinking eh -.-), kurangkan lagha and paling susah, kurangkan ketawa =.=" Org cakap bila ketawa melebih ilmu keluar balik. And ciri-ciri orang yang tak berapa nak bijak ohmaii terasa T___T lepasni gelak tutup mulut jangan sampai terdongak-dongak ye Raisya -.-"

So uhm guys im going to start my whole journey in this brand new life and study field, with brand new friend circle and environment, gheez im so nervous for this. Ya Allah, permudahkanlah urusan aku disana nanti. InsyaAllah, kalau performance baik boleh fly hehe aminnnnnn! :D

This 23rd July 2011, i will officially go for UniKL ISE City Campus, taking Bachelor of Islamic Banking & Finance, class of 2014. Doakan saya eh kawan-kawan? Berkat doa ibubapa, family and kawan-kawan, insyaAllah everything will be just fine for me. Hari juga ialah hari terakhir aku akan berkhidmat di Parkson, memang sedih sangat rasanya. But life goes on and i need to move forward. Banyak pengalaman yang aku dapat sepanjang hampir 3 bulan bekerja ni. Baru tau betapa susahnya nak dapat duit haihhh dulu pakai tabur-tabur je (okay ni obviously tipu, tabur as in buang duit on unnecessary things). Thanks for the memories guys, you all will be missed :'D

Harap semuanya berjalan dengan lancar, Amin ya rabb. Terima kasih sekali lagi.

p/s : Baru berangan nak puasa penuh kat rumah huhu

Another test.

2011-07-16T01:00:00.001+08:00

Tiada rezeki kali ini. Takpe Raisya boleh cuba lagi \m/

Ramai yang terkejut dengan result aku. Oh well jangan cakaplah, tuan punya badan pun beberapa kali recheck status permohonan, manalah tahu kan kalau internet system yang masalah or tersalah masuk nombor kad pengenalan ke apa. Tapi memang benar, perkataan 'dukacita' itu yang akan muncul. 'Sukacita' macam takda dalam kamus hidup aku. Nasib baik masa check first time, aku ada customer. Belum sempat rasa pahit sampai kehati, aku terpaksa kemam dulu. Terpaksa senyum kat customer, terpaksa layan customer bertanya pasal Bonuslink, terpaksa layan anak comel customer nak belajar cara wrapping bentuk 'paperbag', terpaksa layan budak kecik bercerita yang semuanya, memang tak kena masa. Rasa bersalah sangat sebab layan budak kecik tu sambil lewa je, padahal budak tu semangat bercerita pasal 'princess life' dia yang siap ada prince charming lah unicorn lah palace lah ish.

Tipu kalau kata tak sedih. Its like, the most important thing kot untuk life stage aku sekarang. But what to do, rezeki takda. Nak menangis air mata darah pun tak guna, it wont change anything. But the chances are still there, i can still apply for rayuan. And its like hundreds of chances out there from the local private unis, just kena rajin cari peluang je. And maybe reconsidering Egypt too. Al-Azhar maybe? Entahlah. Things are still blurry for now. Kita step by step dulu, jangan gelojoh semua uni nak kaut. Keputusan rayuan UPU pun belum keluar lagi pfft.

Apa-apa pun, aku masih menaruh harapan pada Tuhan, aku percaya Dia ada plan tersendiri untuk aku, just that aku masih lagi clueless, and Dia masih lagi bermain teka-teki dengan aku. Mungkin dia mahu lihat aku berusaha dulu, dan mahu mengajar aku untuk tidak berputus asa bila diuji oleh-Nya. Kalau nak bandingkan ujian tak dapat UPU aku ni dengan ujian anak yatim, anak bumi Iraq & Palestin, anak orang miskin yang homeless, memang kecik benau. At least, rezeki aku dari aspek lain masih lagi ada. Allah baru tarik kejap satu nikmat kejayaan daripada aku. So chill Rai, Allah knows the best for you! :)

p/s: Nifsu Syaaban hari ini :))

Destinasi seterusnya.

2011-07-14T00:18:00.001+08:00

UPU result keluar this Friday and Allah saja yang tahu betapa takutnya aku skrg ni. Semoga Allah perkenankan doa aku untuk melanjutkan pelajaran dalam bidang sastera Bahasa Inggeris September nanti. Its either in UPM or UKM, Allah saja yang tahu. Tapi jangan terkejut kalau tiba-tiba aku announce yang aku akan mengambil jurusan Islamic Banking di UiTM nanti, sebab itu pilihan #8 aku dalam senarai UPU haha. Apa-apa pun, aku hanya mahukan satu placement untuk aku sambung belajar, tak kiralah universiti apa dan course apa. Sebab aku yakin apa yang aku terima itu adalah pilihan Allah sendiri untuk aku. Ala lagipun kalau dah asalnya benih yang baik, campak mana-mana pun akan menjadi pulau ye dak? Eceh hahahahhaa.

Semoga kita semua akan beroleh satu lagi kejayaan Jumaat ini. Aku doakan untuk semua, jangan risau ;)

Rindu zaman belajar kat Puncak Alam dulu. Haih bila je lagi dapat berperangai macam ni lepasni? Tahun depan umur dah masuk 20. Ye Raisya, dah hampir 2 dekad kau bernafas atas bumi Allah ni. Sila bersyukur skrg. Alhamdulillahhh :))

p/s: Mungkin akan menganggur kembali dalam masa terdekat nanti :|

Bad strokes.

2011-07-12T02:02:00.001+08:00

Heyy.

First and foremost, saya cuti hari ni hekhekhekhekhek :3 Actually, its an emergency leave atas sebab-sebab peribadi yang mengejutkan dan annoying dan menyeramkan but i prefer not to talk about it now. Dahlah tengah tinggal kat rumah sorang-sorang ni semorang pergi kerja/sekolah T__T

Dijadikan cerita, malam tadi saya accident. Hmmmph. Sukacita dimaklumkan baby Vivatron saya dah jahanam dan sampai ke detik ini saya memang tak sampai hati nak tatap kereta saya. Semalam pun dah cukup sayu tahu takkk T__T One side of my car dah rata habis dah, pintu remuk, body calar sampai cat tertanggal and anything in between. Tak sanggup nak describe lagi nanti air mata mengalir T__T But on top of that, saya sangat bersyukur kerana masih dapat meminjam nyawa yang Allah berikan kat saya. Kalau tak, mesti tak sempat nak tahu keputusan UPU diri sendiri wuwuwuwu.

And i almost forget its July already, maksudnya dah 4 bulan saya bercuti dan 2 bulan jugak saya dah bekerja. Contract ends on 3rd August and i think i will not extend it. Cukuplah 3 bulan kerja 12 jam hari-hari dan balik rumah tak sempat jumpa family sebab semua dah tidur. Tulang rasa nak patah -.-

The reason why i am not updating this blog much lately is because of my current working life. Tak sempat oh bila dah balik kerja nearly 11pm everyday. Plus, nothing interesting to talk about lately, hence the boring life that leads to no updates. But insyaAllah bila dah habis kerja lagi 3 minggu ni, dah tak tinggalkan blog dah hehehehehe :3

Im having the 'time' of my month now hence the pink nails hehehehe. This is the least i can do when im having a real bad fever on my off day today pffft

Wind of change.

2011-07-01T23:31:00.015+08:00

Pathways, streams, and rivers all change
When the change strikes life's rhythm
The rhythm of the rain will also change
And the nature of seasons will change

But i shall forever be the same to you as i've been
Arm in arm, with you, every moment.

Always.

p/s: July has finally arrived, and a lot of things had changed. I hope i wont lost myself too.

No one knows like we do

2011-06-30T02:38:00.002+08:00

When we met for the first time, who knew you would be so important to me one day. Up until today, you can still give me those butterflies whenever you are talking to me. You can still give me those shaky nerves whenever you whisper those love words to me. You can give me all those kind of feelings people write novels about. And how can i ever resist your genuine smile that never fails to melt my heart?

How funny when a total stranger can turned out being the world to me. Being away from you taught me to become independent and try to live my life to the fullest and not constantly stay under the rock just because you are not with me. Yes i always cry myself to sleep, as i didn't have that strength and courage to withstand the hard times and pains being so far away from you but you always pushed me forward instead of pulling me down. You always convince me with your trust and love.

Honestly, i didn't mean to be in love with you. Like i said earlier, i never thought that you will be the one i will be missing the most. But after 2 years, we ended here, falling for each other every single day. People always say everything is just plain beautiful when youre in love, but trust me it doesn't happen all the time. There are still tears, pains, scars, and bruises in our relationship but those things actually complete this whole journey. You once told me i shouldn't have to go through this as you thought you can't gave the ultimate happiness for me in this relationship. But i told you, i already chose this. Yes i knew it wasn't going to be easy and i knew not everyone would accept us,but i already chose you cuz i want you. I know you're the man i want to grow old with, the man i want to have babies with, the man i want to spend my 'forever' with. If it means being with you, any distance is worth it :)

“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.” — Bob Marley

I want to thank you for being with me and trusting me all this while. Thank you for sticking by my side, even when I was wrong, even when I was childish, even when I was ridiculous.You have no idea what you have done for me, not the slightest clue. I pray for us, may all of our dreams come true and may Allah grants our wish to be together till the end of time. I love you, Khaidhir ♥

p/s: 25 months down, a lifetime to go :)

Fun fun fun.

2011-06-25T13:11:00.000+08:00

Baru sampai Sentosa, we were in the bus.

Rasanya tengok sekali imbas pun boleh tahu siapa bini paling muda HAHA

With my all-time favourite girlfriends ever since high school, Mira and Shezoe :)

A walk at the Siloso Beach. Sampai cuci mata tengok orang skinny-dipping, tu yang girang betei hahaha.

Baju hijau tu anak tiri. Tapi kadang-kadang boleh manjelma menjadi seekor kucing yang alim di Twitter hahahah

Siapa sangka ahli BGP sekolah dan top school rule-breaker mampu berkawan rapat kini? Kau hado? HAHA

Sejuk hati tengok suami sendiri HAHAHA *puke

Baik tak kitorang main kat pantai fully-dressed? Ekekekeke

Duta the Obedient Wives Club, hahahhhahahhahaha.

Okay turn Mira pulak admire hubby sendiri. Korang still boleh detect lagi siapa bini paling muda dalam gambar ni, hahahahahah :D

After cycling along 3 different beaches, we were so tonned up, feeling Maria Sharapova kejap. Buda pulak terus tanned habis, terus jadi manggis (hitam manis, haha)

3 Madu. HAHAHAHAHA

And finally...

YEAY! FAMILY POTRAIT! ♥ ♥ ♥ HEHE

Oh wait! During our final night in Johor Bahru, we finally had the chance to rumble the birthday girl of the day - Mira. Yes, we never had the chance to rumble her during our days in Samura so we decided to visit Danga Bay and make the prank there ngeheheheheh

Tempat yang dibawa sangat romantik, kiri-kanan ada orang dating atas motor and dalam kereta. Depan ada laut and cruise yang cantik, lighting pun samar-samar, memang romantik. Malangnya kena baling tepung muahahahahhaaha!

Singapore was awesome! Definitely will come again in the future X) And to Mira, Happy 19! May Allah bless you with an awesome journey to New Zealand and may all your dreams come true! We love you :)

p/s: Nampak beno malas nak tulis pepanjang hahahah. Better elaboration here, writings from the Birthday girl herself :D

And the reality is...

2011-06-15T05:26:00.001+08:00

I think my brain works extra hard today. I think too much, i think about so many things, yet i still cant figure out the best words to spill here just to describe and tell you what is exactly roaming around in my head at this moment. I feel uhm intimidated? Intimidated by the future that awaits. I dont know what God has planned for me, yet i dont know if i even like it.

But whatever happens after this, i know God had kept the best for me, and i shall just walk the life as usual. I know my pace, but every inch of the guts inside me is all from Him. He arranges everything, im just playing my role. I am not paid to do this but awesome rewards are waiting for those who deserves from Him, and who doesnt want that?

But i keep on feeling this strange sensation. I.feel.completely.different. Its like im breathing inside someone else's body. My wardrobe is changing, i dont feel like wearing the blue jeans with shirts and cardigan anymore. Shawls? I didnt even know where i placed em all. I currently prefer to chill at home more than having hangouts or movies with friends. I seldom scold my brothers anymore. I am more sensitive at heart lately, even by just looking at an old person eating alone at a restaurant can kill me a little inside. And since when do i become really talkative to almost everyone including the ones who used to give me those awkward moments whenever im with them?

Things revolving around me are not like what i used to see before this. They are changing too. Less familiar faces, more strangers. Time had changed everything. Fun and enjoyment are not the main priority now. Its all about the future. Everyone has already taking it seriously, everyone is chasing for it. Every sweat counts, its almost like a race for all of us. Face it, life has taken its toll on us. When we grow up, things drift away.

Maybe its already the time when the butterfly needs to come out from its cocoon.

Have a nice day lovelies, xx

Parkson oh Parkson.

2011-06-06T21:09:00.001+08:00

So its been a month since i start working here. Alhamdulillah, so far so good. Eventhough theres of course, a little bit of this and that throughout the time but those things are just completing the whole new journey of me here. Met a lot of new friends here from different backgrounds and hometown. Learnt a lot of new things, i even can call myself a professional photocopy machine right now as i always need to copy lots of documents everyday. It feels good when i am basically doing office jobs but the difference is that my 'desk' is at the outside of the main office, hehe. And yes, i deal with customers, clients, staffs and others every single day. Its awezomee.

But its not so awesome when your colleagues keep on leaving the workplace from time to time. And when customers come to your counter and rap some illiterate abusive words on your face when its OBVIOUSLY his/her own fault. Lantak pi dia lah, gaji gua masuk jugak ha-ha-ha.

That's my floor executive and she was the head for the ladies department and my department (customer service) previously. The name is Norhananiolfah, or better known as the furious Ofa by the Parkson team, haha :P

She already left Parkson last week, heading for a better life in her hometown in Kota Tinggi. I must say, i really admire her 'i-dont-give-a-damn-on-what-you-say-about-me' personality and that taught me not to always think about what people talk about us (the bad things, obviously) as long as we know ourselves well and we know what we are doing. People will always be judgmental we cant stop that. Kak Ofa had taught me numerous of tips on surviving at the workplace including the do's and don'ts when we are working in a big company like this. She also taught me how to mix along with the people here when its obvious to see they are in the different age range with mine hence the different brain wavelength, thinking, sensitivity and manners. In other word, I learn to grow up here. Thanks Kak Ofa :)

At the right hand side of yours is my supervisor slash mentor ever since i work here. His name is Al-Wafi and i tell you, he is one of the funniest guy i ever met in my life! Just see his face in the picture man hahaha :P And the guy at your left hand side is also a supervisor, specifically for the toys department. His name is Muhaimin. Feels awkward that he has the same name as my adorable 5-year old little cousin Muhaimin, so i just prefer to call him Amin. Well, almost everyone does that haha. Please ignore my mintak lempang face by the way zzzz -.-

Unfortunately for me, Abg Wafi had left Parkson too on last Saturday, leaving only 1 senior CS crew now, Noreen. But as my contract is renewed and stretched to the end of August now, at least i can help Kak Noreen to teach the new crews after this. Seriously, being a CS crew is one hell of a job man. Handling papers and people in the same time, i am still not comfortable with that fact though, it is sooooo tiringgg yknow sobs.

Theres my counter. Tiny winy counter that unbelievably fits 5 people in one time, or 8 if you count in the tummies, hahahaha. The specky one is Kak Noreen, and the standing one is Kak Zurin, the one replacing Abg Wafi after he left us hanging here without a trace (ayat tacing haha). Kak Zurin is previously a supervisor for the ladies department, before she is leveled up (LOL) and become the newest CS crew. Syabas Inspector Sahab, hahaha :D

The five of us. Oh yes Im the youngest bytheway so boleh bajet adik bongsu kejap hihihihiehieheueehuehueuhe :PP

So this is where i work now, another 2 months and i have to leave this place for my studies. I am blessed with wonderful people i met here. They make me love my job! Rasanya kalau diorang tak macam ni, after first pay gua dah cabut lari rasanya hahaha. Thanks guys hihi. This job, although a bit tiring (mentally and physically), but it is definitely worthy. I wanna gain a lot more experiences here as i know, one fine day, i'll be working permanently and with this experience, insyaAllah things will be easier for me in the future :)

Gambar dengan boss kena ada jugak woi haha okay this is my Senior Manager of Parkson BP ni, Mr Seek.

Baik punya saya landing atas perut abang Alif HAHAHA :PP

And terimalah gambar ni sebagai penutup bicara hahahaha byeee X)

so how about your working experience? Mind to share? :)

my heart skips a beat

2011-06-02T02:36:00.004+08:00

Aku tak pernah menyesal mengenali dia. Mungkin orang luar nampak kami tidaklah seperti orang lain yang hari-hari berjumpa, ambil gambar peluk bagai harom tu or tiap-tiap malam buat Supersavers sampai telinga panas, tapi kami okay sampai sekarang. Tipulah kalau tak pernah gaduh (memang selalu), kawan yang rapat memang semua tahu bagaimana kadangkala aku rasa nak give up sebab entah, mungkin hati aku masih belum bersedia untuk long distance apa bagai ni semua tapi dia lah yang selalu jadi penyebab aku kuat kembali. Entahlah silap aku jugak kot cepat sangat melting sampai lupa nak beku balik -.- Tapi jujur, aku memang sangat sukakan pemikiran matangnya yang sedikit sebanyak dapat mengimbang sifat pramatang aku skrg haha T_T Dia yakinkan aku yang dia benar-benar menyayangi aku dan inginkan hubungan ini untuk pergi lebih jauh, kalau boleh sampai ada 11 'mini Raisya and Khaidhir' sebab dia nak train semua jadi footballer - cita-cita nya dahulu sebelum terpesong ke bidang perubatan hahaha. Mungkin dia rasa aku ni sebuah kilang so tadahal nak keluarkan 11 bijik anak -.-" tapi takpe, dia punya pasal aku tadahal. Yelah kata lautan api pun sanggup kuredahi kan hahaha.

Lagi 3 hari genaplah 2 tahun kami menyulam cinta (loya kan baca benda camni? hahahahahahaaaha padan muka) Tapi Mira kata rasa macam tujohblas tahun hahaha kongajo. Aku tak tau apa yang tertakdir untuk kami dalam 3-4-5 tahun akan datang. Mungkin masih bersama, mungkin tidak. Tapi aku sentiasa mendoakan yang terbaik untuk kami. Manalah tahu, 5 tahun lagi nampak aku tungtangtungtang belakang rumah buat nasik minyak muihehehiiheiuhuhhohuuuhueheehe kbai

Aku memang cuba untuk tidak mengeluarkan apa-apa statement berbaur romantik, angau, jiwang dan seumpamanya dalam entri ni. Aku sayangkan member yang baca blog ni, aku taknak diorang diarrhea lepas baca benda ni haha.

late night mumbling

2011-05-31T02:22:00.003+08:00

Alhamdulillah, ternyata pilihan untuk bekerja di sini bukanlah another silly mistake yang i buat dalam hidup i, so far. Banyak benda yang i belajar, and the absolute top of it is that i belajar untuk jadi lebih matang. Yep, dengan umur yang bakal menginjak 20 tahun dalam masa beberapa bulan ni, benar-benar mendorong i untuk perlahan-lahan mengubah cara pemikiran i, as well as my attitude, looks and stuff. Alhamdulillah, mungkin sebab rakan sekerja i semuanya didalam lingkungan 20-an, sedikit sebanyak memang memberi kesan dalam diri i.

I keep on gaining my self confidence day by day, thanks to the customers i served for the past whole month. Dulu bukan main taknak lagi bila ibu suruh pergi order makanan kat KFC, sebab takut. Yepp, i dulu memang sangat tak confident. Ibu suruh pergi kaunter kat kedai makan untuk bayar pun bertolak-tolak dengan adik lain. Macam tu punya pathetic -.- Tapi skrg, even tiba-tiba my infamous big pimple yang memang selalu muncul sebijik kat tengah-tengah dahi ni ada, i still selamba yaya layan customer tanpa rasa bersalah hahahaha. Persetankan je mata yang memandang indirectly to my eyes. I tau mata diorang lagi tertarik kat 'mata' ketiga i tu pffft -.-

Adat kat mana-mana tempat pun, kat sekolah ke tempat kerja ke ape ke, mesti ada konflik kan. But working here makes me realize that life is just too short to give a damn on other people's lives. Daripada bad-mouthing pasal orang yang buat kita sakit hati tu, baik kita diam and go with other friends yang boleh betulkan balik mood kita yang dah tercalar tu. Senang kan? Orang lain pun sebenarnya takda masa nak layan masalah kita, sebab diorang pun ada masalah sendiri. By knowing these wonderful people, i learn to take care of my heart all by myself. Bila bengang dengan orang, i pandai-pandai lah pujukkan hati sendiri. Bila orang tu okay balik dengan kita, automatically kita akan lupa apa yang dia pernah buat kat kita. The heart has unlimited space to fill in with lots of love and care, not with anger and hatred. We tend to hold grunges and say rude words masa kita tengah sakit hati. Syaiton semua tu, kau paham tak? Gelap hati nanti aku taktau kau tak bau syurga hayokk hahahaha :P

And this place teaches me that not everyone will forever be there for you. Somehow, some people might leave us someday. And even id just been here for uhm a month, the bonds created between me and the staffs here especially the guys in my department are very strong. But its not me that holding the fate, Abang Wafi my dearest CS partner will be leaving us soon, after he finally decided to go further his studies in Occupational Health. He's such a nice guy that i dah anggap dia macam abang sendiri, lagi-lagi bila dia sendiri cakap dia memang anggap i ni macam adik dia. He is so funny, never fails to make me laugh with his spontaneous jokes and hilarious moves, dahlah i ni jenis kuat ketawa haha mannnnnnn im so gonna miss him after this! Dahlah sejak i start kerja, i memang sentiasa partner dengan dia, memang jaga kaunter tu berdua, kena maki dengan customer pun berdua haih this is so sad lahhh why lah this must happen now when im starting to love this job T___T

Another CS team is leaving too, which is Dinie the guy who entered the department the same day as mine. he's 20 but entahlah he reminds me of my annoying brother hahahaha. But he's nice too, entahlah semua orang baik pun nak tinggalkan haku skrg tssssskkk tacing siut camni T_________T

Okay dah pukul 2.18am and im still awake? Ni memang macam nak mintak bala datang kerja lambat pagi esok -.-

Gambar pengubat rindu uolls hahahahhahaha k lempang i skrg pls =.=

Talking bout future.

2011-05-25T18:54:00.002+08:00

Main UKM dengan UPM je, sebab parents tak bagi pergi U jauh-jauh. Susah nak trace and jenguk, katanya. Tak pilih UiTM for now sebab rasanya not all courses buat kat UiTM Shah Alam so kalau tetiba tercampak UiTM Dungun ke Pekan ke ape ke tak macam menangis berlagu pilu pulak kan. Plus, UiTM takda English Studies :( If say tak dapat UPU kali ni, and really want to pursue in UiTM, apply jelah for next intake kan. InsyaAllah UiTM sayang lagi produk diorang *sedapkan hati.

Kalau rezeki lebih, maybe i will just go for any local private university and re-do my foundation or teruskan ke degree in my desired course. Entahlah, kita tengok je dulu macam mana. Sekarang nak pikir kerja dulu. Lately ni macam serabut sikit, colleague pressure i think?

So whats your say about my UPU list ni? Ada opinion? Kalau ada senior courses yang mentioned kat atas ni bolehlah drop a comment or two and share your thoughts about the courses. I would love to hear from you guys :)

budak zaman sekarang.

2011-05-20T00:21:00.001+08:00

Ahad lepas i kerja. Seperti yang semua orang tahu, hari esoknya ialah Hari Guru. So as expected jugak, i memang macam nak senget pinggang sebab madah wrapping barang je dari pagi sampai malam. Dengan layan karenah customers yang bermacam hal, memang menguji kesabaran dan kekuatan mental betul. Nasiblah i ni 'penyabar' lagi 'baik hati', i gagahkan jelah diri, walaupun dalam hati syaiton sibuk suruh bakar je hadiah customers yang cerewet tu semua, hahaha.

Dalam ramai-ramai customers, i teringat seorang budak perempuan kecil ni. Umur dia rasanya dalam 11 atau 12 tahun. Dia datang dengan 2 orang rakan sekelas, dan ibunya juga ikut sama sebab jadi tukang pegang duit kelas. Dijadikan cerita, budak-budak ni nak pergi belikan hadiah untuk guru kelas diorang.

*hulurkan beg plastik*

Adik cun : "Akak, mintak tolong wrappingkan boleh?"

Akak cun (HAHA) : "Boleh, duduk lah dulu."

I pun keluarkanlah barang dari dalam plastik beg tersebut. Tengok price tag, RM200+. Tengok brand, Bonia. Okay fine.

Taktaulah kenapa, sejak dah kerja ni telinga i jadi macam telinga tikus dah. Tajam betul pendengaran. Customer berbisik kat depan pun boleh dengar full story muahahaha so sambil-sambil wrapping tu, TERdengar lah perbualan budak-budak kecik ni dengan aunty sorang ni.

"Ma, duit ada berapa lagi ye?"

*keluarkan duit dari purse, nampak duit hijau tua dan ungu cair bercampur-baur* "Ada lagi RM200 lebih ni. Adik kata nak beli kek pulak lepasni kan?"

*sambil sedut Coolblog* "A'ah"

"Beli kat La Luna jelah ye. Yang dekat Bukit Pasir tu,"

"Eh tak boleh ma! Tak sedap. Kita beli kat Secret Recipe lah, yang cheese cake tu."

Okay fine.

"Ma, yang duit lebih tu beli apa lagi ek?"

"Simpan jelah bagi bendahari kelas. Nanti boleh buat parti kelas"

"Tak boleh, diorang suruh habiskan. Takpelah ma kita pergi beli Big Apple lah,"

Okay fine.

Dah siap wrapping, hadiah tu pun dimasukkan kembali kedalam beg plastik dan dihulurkan kembali kepada aunty tersebut. Tiba-tiba terdengar bunyi handphone, macam bunyi mesej. Tapi bukan i punya.

"Ma, pergi beli Big Apple tau! Diorang suruh habiskan duit!" kata budak perempuan cun itu kepada aunty tersebut, sambil tangannya sibuk menekan-nekan keypad Blackberry Bold yang dipegangnya.

Budak-budak zaman sekarang ni makin lama makin menakutkanlah. I dulu bagi pen je kat guru kelas i masa sekolah rendah dulu -.-"

Entah apesal tah budak ni.

Offline.

2011-05-14T20:17:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Im working right now but since takda customer, so update kejap lah heuheuhuehuehue.

I need to blog fast cuz my boss can appear like anytime from now, haha. So erm what to write eh? Hmm lets talk about my current job right now. So alhamdulillah, id been working here for 2 weeks now, and so far, it is great :) Met a lot of people, new friends, and surprisingly i can say that ive gaining quite a lot of social skills and probably self-confidence, well korang pun tau kan i punya self confidence mmg ada lacking sikit (sobs) but so far, so good. With great teammates, i cant ask for more. Anyways, apart of that, i think ive gained some weight too -.-" Maklumlah kerjanya dudukkk je, kalau terpaksa lunch sorang, i'll opt terus for McD drive-thru, so korang boleh calculate sendiri lah berapa calories consumed per working day. Bila off day, membuta. Hmm =.=

Whatever it is, i am happy with my work now :B Okay gtg, supervisor dah datang hahahaha. Bye :D

Kisah saya dan ibu saya.

2011-05-08T00:40:00.002+08:00

Assalamualaikum.

Sepanjang hidup saya, saya tak pernah wish Happy Mother's Day dekat ibu saya. Bila birthday ibu datang, saya tak pernah wish. Tiba-tiba je, ayah ajak keluar dinner sama-sama satu family. Masa tu, semua orang pun faham maknanya nak pergi 'celebrate' birthday. Tapi masa dinner tu pun, memang takda sorang pun yang akan stood up and said 'Happy Birthday __!' sambil peluk cium bagai. Ya, keluarga saya memang pelik.

Sepanjang hidup saya, saya tak pernah bagi apa-apa untuk ibu. And saya rasa loser sangat, sebab dulu saya ada boyfriend yang birthday dia dekat-dekat dengan ibu. Tapi saya pilih untuk save duit and belikan hadiah untuk boyfriend saya. Masa umur 15 tahun, saya sanggup saving duit poket yang ayah bagi tiap-tiap kali pergi sekolah and belikan perfume Hugo Boss untuk dia, siap bersengkang mata wrap cantik-cantik. Bila fikir balik, rasa macam nak tembak je kepala diri sendiri masa tu. Last-last, break jugak dengan lelaki tu. Siap masa terjumpa dia beberapa minggu lepas break tu, dia masih lagi pakai perfume tu, sebab bau nya sama. Tapi tangan dia ada perempuan lain yang peluk. Hawau betul -.- Ibu pulak, sampai sekarang ada dengan saya.

Saya tak pernah menangis depan ibu. I mean, saya tak pernah mengadu masalah sampai menangis-nangis depan dia. Ada masalah je, saya pergi cari kawan. Saya menangis kat kawan saya. Entahlah, saya rasa lagi selesa share masalah dengan kawan berbanding ibu. Tapi saya rasa nak tembak kepala saya sebab bila ibu tanya pasal masalah saya, saya tinggikan suara and cakap 'Ibu takyah tau lahh'. Entah dah berapa kali buat macam tu. Saya rasa bodoh sangat, mesti ibu rasa sedih. Sudahlah saya anak perempuan tunggal, mestilah dia impikan anak perempuan macam orang lain. Yelah, orang lain kan ramai yang macam 'best friend' dengan anak sendiri. Tapi saya tak. Saya tak pernah layan macam tu kat ibu.

Tapi tahun ni, taktau kenapa saya rasa lain sangat. Sebenarnya masa birthday ibu Oktober lepas, saya ada belikan hadiah. Even tak seberapa, tapi saya puas hati sebab saya memang pakai duit sendiri, bukan duit yang ayah bank in buat belanja kat Palam -.- Tapi saya tak bagi-bagi pun lagi hadiah tu sampai skrg sebab saya segan. Ye, saya segan dengan ibu saya sendiri. Ye, anda boleh lempang saya skrg -.-"

Petang semalam, lepas balik kerja, saya singgah ke sebuah gift shop di bandar, hati tergerak sendiri untuk menghadiahkan sesuatu untuk ibu sempena Hari Ibu hari ini. Alhamdulillah,saya dapat apa yang saya cari :) Bila sampai rumah, gelabah nak sorokkan hadiah sebab besar :)

Ibu akan menginjak usia 55 tahun Oktober nanti. Satu umur yang agak berusia untuk saya yang masih berumur 19 tahun ini. Saya seorang yang sangat suka berfikiran jauh. So saya selalu terfikir, usia ibu semakin lanjut, entah esok entah lusa, Allah nak ambil balik ibu dari saya. Tapi sampai skrg, saya belum pernah lagi banggakan ibu saya. I flunked my SPM, i sucked my Asasi, i was never be an obedient daughter before, i always raised my voice towards her, i always get stucked into quarrels with her where they always lead to door slammings and shoutings. I never treat her right, i never express my love infront of her, i never, be a good daughter to her. Did i mentioned i am a bad cook too? Ya, saya tak pernah senangkan dia.

So hari ini, or more precise pagi nanti, buat pertama kalinya saya akan cuba beranikan diri dan kikiskan rasa segan untuk memberi hadiah kepada ibu. Saya nak bagi hadiah untuk dia buat pertama kali dalam hidup saya, saya nak cakap depan dia yang saya sangat sayangkan dia selama ni, dan saya sanggup mati untuk dia. And saya nak menangis depan dia buat pertama kali masa saya peluk dia esok pagi.

Happy Mother's Day, ibu. Raisya sayang sangat dekat ibu. i'm always afraid to lose you, sampaikan saya tak sanggup nak bayangkan bagaimana keadaan saya bila ibu dah takda satu hari nanti. I will never be strong without you and ayah. I love you to bits, ibu :')

already working :D

2011-05-05T23:16:00.001+08:00

Assalamualaikum guys 8)

Sorry for not updating. Quite busy lately. Busy makan, hahaha :P Anyways, mulai semalam, i dah officially jadi one of the Parkson Square One crew. Alhamdulillah, things went smoothly and i have a great new family there, semua orang friendly and sekepala despite the age range yang agak besar. My supervisor is 27yrs old but tahap masuk air tu lebih kurang sama je macam i hehehe. They said that i am the first female trainee for the Customer Service Department ever since the store was opened 2 years ago, well kebetulan masa i apply kerja hari tu ada pekerja yang berhenti, so ada lah kekosongan disitu. There's another trainee (a male one) and thank God he is nice too. It is so awkward when both of us just known each other yesterday and we went for lunch together and he even tumpang my car! Hahaha nampak sangat dua-dua tengah takda member lain kat sana and terpaksa makan berdua sebab taknak nampak forever alone makan sorang-sorang kat cafe hahaha -.- But we did chitchatted a bit, just for the sake to break the ice and get to know each other better. Well, both of us will be working together for like at least 3months from now.

The working environment is nice, and very positive. Everyone's helpful and cheerful. Even my exec is so funny she even spill the 'panjangnya kopek' joke to us during the lunch break hahaha. Whatever it is, i am so thankful to have them as i have lots of negative thoughts about my working place before i step in to work but Alhamdulillah, my first day went well :)

So im really sorry if i rarely update this blog after this, its either i am too tired to even switch on my laptop or i am too preoccupied with my baby tumblr hehehe. Till then, xoxo.

p/s : I dah reti wrapping wehh! Baru belajar beberapa minit dah kena wrap 8 barang pheww. Memang cemas betul kena buat cepat-cepat sebab taknak customer tunggu lama. Haish customer zaman skrg ni -.-

Sealed with a kiss.

2011-05-04T14:02:00.000+08:00

Fairytale does exist. Happy May everyone :)

We are not alone.

2011-04-26T00:20:00.002+08:00

Assalamualaikum.

Dah lama tak jenguk blog. Well, nothing much happening in my current life right now. Its so dull and plain at the moment. So i think its pretty obvious here that i wont be updating about it. I want to talk about something else,something that id experienced in the past.

I am not a strong believer on anything regarding paranormal activities and stuff. I admit i love to read about them, but its just for the sake of reading enjoyment, nothing else. This may sounds a bit scaring, but i really love anything related to horror, ghosts, sadism, psychotic souls etcetera. I dont really fancy fantasized love dream, romance, blablabla cuz i dont find any excitement in them. Sekadar buat modal berangan okaylah.

So back to the point, i remembered this one night. While everyone was at the surau for Maghrib/Isyak prayers, i was on my bed, studying. Its my ABC time (kalau perempuan, dia tahu makna ABC ni apa hehe) and unfortunately for me, i was the only 'lucky' person to get my menses that day, so lepak jelah sorang-sorang dalam dorm. Usually aktiviti surau setiap malam Jumaat kat sekolah aku ni habis around 9pm, so i had like 2 hours of the 'me-time' alone in the dorm, which masa tu dah nak SPM so aku study lah Sejarah (pilihan yang agak salah disitu bila kita bercakap tentang 'study atas katil').

Tiba-tiba, beberapa minit selepas azan Isya', aku terdengar ada benda terjatuh ke lantai. Aku ingatkan pen aku ka, pemadam ka handphone ka yang jatuh. Bila check, takda pun yang jatuh. Aku tengok kearah segenap lantai dorm, memang takda apa yang terjatuh. So i assumed it was from other nearby dorms. But the sound was popped out again for the second time, and this time, i can confidently tell myself its from my bed. Sedang aku jengah kebawah katil (taktaulah kenapa masa ni bajet berani tapi bodoh macam most watak dalam cerita hantu), aku terdengar bunyi orang berlari anak dari dalam dorm. Cuba test lari anak (laju sikit tapi tak pecut) atas tiled floor kejap. Ce buat ce buat.

Ha macam tu lah.

Masa tu pantas aku angkat kepala nak tengok siapa yang berlari tu (its an involuntary action,mind you. Bukannya bajet hero cerita hantu yang sentiasa berani nak find out) but nobody's there, except me. After that, keadaan kembali seperti biasa. Eventhough aku dah cuak cuak sikit time tu, tapi aku tak cerita kat sesiapa masa budak dorm aku dah balik dari surau.

Sehinggalah tepat pukul 11, malam yang sama, seperti biasa semua dorm akan mula membaca Al-Mulk secara serentak dalam keadaan halaqah (duduk dalam bulatan, with knees joined with other's, so that the halaqah tak 'terbuka/putus'. As i was not capable to read the Quran, i just sat still in the halaqah. It was okay for the first few minutes sampailah pada 'Salamun kaulam mirrobbir rahim' yang dibaca 3 kali tu, tiba-tiba aku rasa sakit pada bahagian tengkuk. Untuk kurangkan sakit, aku try lah bengkokkan badan, but that just made the thing went even worse. Masa tu Allah jelah tau betapa sakitnya tengkuk aku, macam kena tekan dari belakang. Lama-kelamaan budak dorm aku semua dah perasan keadaan aku yang dah macam nak cium carpet dorm tu. But they kept on reciting the Yasin with one of my dormmate tried to calm me by rubbing my back, but that didn't worked at all. In fact, i felt a slight sense of burning at my back. Ya Allah memang macam nak menangis je, erm actually air mata dah start menitik dah time tu :/

Usai membaca Yasin, naqibah dorm aku terus datang kat aku. Aku just cakap 'aku rasa ada benda kat atas aku sekarang, kau buat lah apa-apa yang patut please' and naqibah aku cepat-cepat bacakan sesuatu dalam sebotol air kosong, while everyone else was holding me, telling me to stay strong and calm. Masa tu, ayat Kursi gua pun tak lepas dah, memang kelu. And actually masa aku tengah berpeluh + penat lawan sakit tu, i accidentally caught something unusual behind one of my dormmate. She was sitting beside her bed, watching me. And i saw this one big and black figure right behind her. That moment was the scariest as i never ever encountered something like that before. The figure stood still, and slowly moved away to the back of the bed and vanished, just like that *snaps fingers*

Belum sempat naqibah aku nak sembur-sembur ke renjis ke apa kat muka aku, rasa sakit tu hilang serta-merta. But it did left me sweating like a pig, and for several days memang tengkuk aku selalu lenguh. Otak aku terfikir ni dah macam dalam cerita hantu Korea ke Jepun tu, yang ada hantu perempuan bertenggek kat bahu dia tu. Mintak simpang T__T

That is perhaps my most horrifying experience so far. There's more on that story, but i just kept it for myself as its my dorm's secret and yeah, cerita sikit-sikit sudahlah hehe. Of seeing 'images' or 'things', i just experienced once which was when i was lepakking with my friend kat taman one night. I was facing the block's clothes line, and it was quite dark over there. My friend was facing the opposite.

Tengah rancak sembang pasal crush masing-masing, tiba-tiba aku nampak macam ada orang tengah menghadap aku. Freehair, aku pun terdetik dalam hati 'Siapa seh berani turun kat ampaian freehair-freehair macam tu?' Aku pun dengan semangatnya tunjuk kat member aku 'Weh kau tengok tu junior sapa la turun blok tak reti pakai tudung tu' (Adat dunia, yang buruk semuanya junior, isk).

'Mana? Takda pun!'

'Tu lahhh. Area-area tempat ampaian Sarjan tuuu' sambil jari telunjuk aku menunjuk kearah tempat perempuan tu. Aisyah senyap (eh tersebut nama pulak haha) and dia menoleh balik pandangan dia kearah aku. 'Dahlah jom lah balik dorm, sejuklah. Banyak nyamuk pulak tu'.

Sesampai di dorm, Aisyah datang kepada aku yang dah mula berselubung dalam selimut. Malam tu memang sejuk. Ah setiap malam pun memang sejuk. Sekolah dekat dengan laut memang macam ni.

'Rai, sebenarnya aku tak nampak apa-apa pun tadi,'

T_____________T

Nak cerita lebih pun, aku tak berani sebab aku takut aku akan menakut-nakutkan bakal-bakal junior yang akan bersekolah kat sekolah aku tu. But baby dontcha worry, i personally think that these kind of things won't be bothering you as long as you are not provoking them with bad thoughts. Janganlah cuba menjolok sarang tebuan kalau taknak kena sengat, get it? Sebab aku yakin, kejadian malam aku ditindih tu memang berpuncakan mulut aku sendiri. No bukanlah aku sesaje cabar 'dia' or bermulut celupar, but yeah kadang-kadang kita pun boleh terlepas cakap kan? Syok sangat bercakap sampai terlepas-lepas benda yang tak patut lepastu padan muka ha hambek kau beberapa hari sakit leher/bahu macam orang tua -.-

And bagi aku, kita kena chill jelah bila berhadapan dengan benda-benda macam ni sebab kadang-kadang, benda ni saja nak main-mainkan kita. Bila tengok kita dok melatah je, naik syeikh lah depa nak kacau kau lagi. Aku selalu dengar bunyi-bunyi dalam dorm aku, mula-mula memanglah takut tapi lama-lama, tetap takut jugak T____T but takdelah lemah semangat sangat. Prinsip aku, selagi aku tak nampak apa-apa, aku abaikan je. Tapi kalau ditakdirkan satu hari aku nampak betul-betul, wallahualam. May Allah bless me wuu.

Bila-bila, aku cerita pulak pengalaman aku kat sunway (bilik basuh baju yang ada washing machine. Canggih en panggil sunway? hahaha) and Koop. Till then :B

3 Simple Ways To Get A Part-Time Job

2011-04-20T07:49:00.000+08:00

As simple as A,B,C. 1,2,3. Alif Ba, Ta. Do,Re,Mi okay enough Raisya.

#1 Dont you ever say that you are a part-timer. Based from my experiences, they usually reject anyone who make them really crystal clear about your availability period. Setakat 2-3 bulan available, they will simply kick you out from the list. Just say you are there permanently. Bila dah nak masuk degree, cakap jelah "Omg semalam i baru dapat offer letter dari UiTM for a degree there omg i memang nak sangat sambung belajar i memang nak ubah nasib family i, i memang nak sangat sambung belajar omg omg omg" okay takyah exaggerate sangat pun boleh kot.

#2 Dont wear fancy clothes when you come to ask for a job. Just take a plain yet a neat look, dont make yourself to look like Paris Hilton, they don't need a hooker to work for them, unless the place youre going is Lorong Haji Taib. Opt for block colors and light clothing. Make yourself appear neat (id emphasized this twice), strong (as in tak lembik) and nampak tak leceh/boleh diharap. Paste that clever look of yours, mana tahu dapat naik pangkat je sebab muka macam Donald Trump.

#3 Be friendly. Sebab kadang-kadang they judge you based on your first impression. Oh actually it happens at all times, bukan kadang-kadang. So just keep that shy little girl inside your pocket and unleash the Kimora in you hahaha numsayin'? Cuz once they seemed to hesitate on you, your chances of getting the job can drop down to 20% or lesser. Cakap pun tak payah nak bisik-bisik sangat. Kalau boleh biar the whole retail shop/restaurant dengar kau nak cari kerja, haha.

Okay tu je kot. I just feel like sharing to you guys cuz dah banyak kali rasa perasaan kena reject tu. Janji nak call tapi sampai kiamat pun macam takda harapan -.- So since id observed through my experiences, i come out with this. Hope it benefits a bit sebab blog ni pun macam makin sampah aku rasa =.=

Good luck! :)

Being home alone is not cool at all!

2011-04-17T22:58:00.001+08:00

I MISS MY GIRLS SO MUCH!

I hate this feeling of being all alone at home. I miss being with my friends and get crazy like we always did. I miss having catfights with them, but the next second we already found ourselves tucked in bed and watch movies together. I miss having a big makan-makan together at the front hall. I miss playing our soft toys and bantal busuk together (hehe). I miss splashing them with water while they took their showers. I miss playing pranks at the elevators and TV room with them. I miss the times when we karaoke-ed at my room so loud til the R1 block next to ours can clearly heard our Celine-Dion-wannabees voice, hehe. I miss watching sunrise by the hill with them, i miss gazing stars and the moon with them. I miss our Leukemic period each time we got exams, tests and quizzes. I miss watching Harold and Kumar with them till we barely called ourselves virgins anymore after watching the ridiculous movie T_T I miss them to bits! Yes, i am that type of people who can't really live well w/o friends.

I dont find anyone who actually can understands me in this house. With friends, at least i am being completely me. I miss playing crazy with them, how i wish they are really my biological sisters :(

So siapa cakap best jadi anak perempuan tunggal? Bosan adalah natang.

"Girlfriends are the people that make you laugh a little louder, smile a little brighter, and live a little better" - unknown.

The Dining Table Story.

2011-04-15T03:22:00.001+08:00

Semalam penat sangat, taktaulah kenapa. Usia dah makin tua barangkali. Dah lama fridge rumah ni tak restock groceries, nah padan muka semalam gelabah cari bahan nak masak untuk dinner. Endingnya setakat masak nasi, masak sardin and goreng ayam. Erm okaylah tu, kenyang jugak perut pulun ayam seketul besar. Lagi kenyang bila tengok adik-adik makan penuh selera, masing-masing makan 2 ketul, nasi bertambah. Depan adik memang lah sound "Hoi apakah ini? Makan 2 ketul habis tu aku nak makan apa?" tapi dalam hati, suka je tengok diorang makan bersungguh. Nasib kau oranglah dapat kakak ego/kasar macam aku haha.

Maaflah mak dapat anak dara tak reti masak macam Raisya ni. Dikala anak orang lain siap masak siakap 3 rasa, kangkung goreng belacan dan marble cake sebagai pencuci pulut, Raisya mampu masak sardin je. Tapi takpe, insyaAllah kalau ingat nak restock groceries esok pagi, balik nanti ada lah kot ikan merah asam pedas kegemaran keluarga dengan sup sayur campur all-time favourite hehehe.

And if you're wondering, saya memang suka cari pasal dengan adik-adik bila tengah makan haha. Yeah i know its rude sebab depan rezeki blablabla but its always my pleasure to irritate my brothers especially during meal times sebab masa tu, they seems like they really need to have that 100% focus to munch and chomp and thats the perfect time to piss them off bahaha!

When lah you will grow up, Raisya? -.----

So how's your holiday so far, Asasians? Dont mind with mine, it sucks big times. One solid reason for not updating this blog for days, in case if you are wondering about it. Okay fine you don't.

Forever alone me -.-

p/s: about the title, sorry. I really cant think of one decent title for this super pathetic post. its just for the sake of updating, he's been complaining on my abandoned blog hence this update. okay kill me now zzzz -.-

Dear girlfriend,

2011-04-09T18:50:00.001+08:00

Remember this picture? It was taken a year ago while we were at the Dataran Pahlawan Mall, eating nasi kandar, right after we took our SPM results. Pinggan depan tu pinggan Bawe. He took this picture :) Remember Topek and Bolai when they sang the 'Rasa Sayang' song at the A Famosa? Remember the days when we were all happy and the hardest thing was the Addmaths questions?

Dear schoolmates, i miss all of you. Especially you Amiratullyana. We had gone through a lot together and how i wish you were here with me. I hate Tania T__T

I hate to feel all alone like now. Sigh.

I am a girl, you are a boy and you will never understand me.

2011-04-09T10:59:00.000+08:00

I slept at 4.30am yesterday and woke up for awhile at 5.30am. My dad was going back to JB for work again. After he left the house, i continued to sleep until i was awake again at 9am. I took a long shower as i felt that theres a lot of tangling things happening in my head. I often do a lot of deep thinkings in the shower, and made decisions before i step out from the bathroom. Usually, these decisions are wiser compared to those i made when i was at somewhere else, especially in my bedroom cuz i tend to emo more everytime i lay on my bed. My pillows are my bestest friends. I cry to them the most.

And now i miss my girlfriends a lot. I need them now. I am so unstable. Physically, mentally, and emotionally.

How I Met Your Mother?

2011-04-08T03:56:00.000+08:00

Finished with the first 4 seasons! *muka gigih*

Barney, why lahhhhh you must be a gayyy -.-----

Video Liwat Anwar Ibrahim.

2011-04-05T21:35:00.000+08:00

Bosanlah tengok tv sekarang. Politik Anwar Ibrahim Najib Razak Anwar Ibrahim Rosmah Mansur (nak jugak tu ada) Anwar Ibrahim Anwar Ibrahim Dato T Sukma Darmawan Azizan Abu Bakar leaked sex video seks liwat video seks liwat video skandal seks skandal seks video liwat liwat liwat liwat liwat liwat liwat liwat.

Bila yang muda nak bersuara, nak utarakan pandangan, nak usulkan cadangan, hangpa semua pakat taknak dengaq. cheq baru bukak mulut dah kena condemn. "Hangpa apa tau, hang tak tengok berita, tak baca paper. Yusry KRU tu pun dah cakap video tu mmg betui takdak edit ka superimpose ka split screen ka ". Sigh, kalau dok pakai satu sumber ja, memang tak kemana lah jawabnya.

Im not talking as if i am at either one's side. But yeah just read this. Sigh, dulu kemain lagi cita-cita nak jadi politician (sebelum tukar jadi dokter) tapi skrg ayah pun tak bagi dah tau. Sedih ah macam ni.

p/s: Yang google pasal seks,liwat,video seks tu mesti hampa sebab directed kat blog biutipulkerep ni hue hue hue padan muka -.-

The guy i love the most.

2011-04-04T05:07:00.001+08:00

Haha manja me, dah lah gembeng haha. Nangis je cari ayah suruh dukung :P

Assalamualaikum.

Alhamdulillah Allah panjangkan umur ayah. Well, ayah turned 57 yesterday. Yes you heard me, its really 57. But i must say he looks much younger than his age, maybe because his head is not already full with grey hairs yet. I pun taktaulah kalau dia ada pakai Bawang senyap-senyap but i think its already in the genetics heheh :P And alhamdulillah, till this date, ayah is still at his best condition. He is in a pink of health as always, paling teruk pun kalau selsema dia sampai each morning. His sneeze is like the best alarm clock in the world, no kidding! Hahahaha nahhh joking je lah ayah :)

My most favourite pic ever. I think we were trying to imitate Simba and his father, haha cuteness :D

Ayah is a funny guy. He never fails to make us laugh with his jokes. Sometimes he's actually not really intended to do jokes or whatnots but his acts, his gestures are just enough to make us ROTFL haha! Yeah, he likes to make funny faces and unpredictable movements till somehow i wonder if he's actually a 10-year-old boy who trapped in a man's body, haha. But that makes him special and more lovable, dont you think so? :)

I was raised by ayah and ibu throughout my whole life, and honestly i can't imagine how will it be when they finally leave us one day. I. just. can't. I live with their love, and without them, i can probably die. So while they are still here for me, i must cherish every moment spent with them. I may dont like them sometimes (well, teenagers), but i always love them, no matter what. I will do anything for them even it means i need to sacrifice my own life. Okay shut up Raisya youre being too emotional -.-

When i was so small and ayah still larat nak pangku i. Ayah pun kurus lagi masa ni hahahhahaha :P

Sebagai penutup bicara, i want to make another birthday shout out for my dearest man, the one who was there for my first steps, the one who was there for my first words, and the one that will be there on the day he gives me away to my bridegroom. So yeah, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AYAH SAYANG! I love you ayah, you will forever be my first man, and i promise this for eternity. Raisya sayang ayah. Thanks for being my Superman :')

Enough said, i really love ayah and ibu so much. Thanks for being a great parents! I cant ask for more :') ♥

Pulau Pinang

2011-04-02T04:55:00.001+08:00

Nazihah sebagai pembuka bicara. Tuuu diaa.

Horse-riding at the beach.

The back one is the penis, hahahaha.

Crystal clear.

Hihihihihihihiihhi *lempang diri sendiri*

Ngeeeeeeeeeeee

It was a nice trip overall, despite the ugly price for the food and stuffs here. Guess that we need to work for bigger paychecks to be spent during our next vacay after this. A big thanks to Bertam Perdana Golf Resort a.k.a Jana's crib hahahahaa at least we had our breakfast and late supper for free ngeheheh :B Thanks to Mak Tok too for preparing the most delicious Laksa Penang evahhh! No joke, it really tasted like heaven! And its my first time eating it with pudina leaves, not bad :)

Thanks too to Raqib for being a good tour guide for us or else we won't find ourselves in Batu Ferringhi yesterday hehe. Lepas kempunan jejak pantai cuti ni hehe. Ohh lepas kempunan jugak nak makan nasi kandaq kat Penang. Jana had really proved to us she's really got a taste when it comes to good food.

Thanks Penang for making our week! Gonna miss the time eating Pasembor with abang guitar at Padang Kota too as well HAHA :P Okay i think thats all for now, broadband sucks big times that i can't upload more pictures in here, boo Celcom :( And i actually just reached my home safely last 6 hours ago so my body is still aching due to fatigued muscles especially the ones at my left shoulder. Ah, i am behaving so mak cik these days, i think i need to start doing some workouts to bring back my stamina and metabolisme as well.

Till then.

Pulau Mutiara.

2011-03-28T04:38:00.001+08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So, as di'tuntang-tuntang'kan dekat Facebook saya sejak dua menjak ni, tibalah hari yang ditunggu-tunggu dimana saya akan berangkat ke Penang pagi ini bersama housemates yang lain untuk sesi cuti-cuti Malaysia tahun ini. Yippiee :D Honestly, saya tak pernah jejakkan kaki ke Penang before so yeah this is my first time :D Asalnya nak pergi naik train KTM but atas sebab-sebab tertentu, terpaksa batalkan niat :( But will be looking forward for it masa on the way balik nanti hehehehe :3

So sepanjang pemergian seketika saya ini, blog ini akan terbiar sekejap so yeah no updates for awhile. BUT BUT BUT, it will definitely a superlong entry stuffed with thousands of pictures once im already back in Batu Pahat hahahaha be prepared guys, sediakan paperbag in case nak termuntah sebab overwhelmed sangat dengan lambakan gambar-gambar perasan model saya dan rakan-rakan nanti kuikuikui :P

Till then, much loves ♥

p/s: Siapa nak souvenir boleh drop your comments here, sertakan alamat and telephone number, senang nak claim duit nanti hahaha

The hardest part in friendship.

2011-03-27T02:53:00.002+08:00

Deep down inside, i really hope we'll be in the same university this September. So that i can see you everyday like i used to during our Samura and Puncak Alam years back then. Hmm, tak kisahlah sebab tak sama course kan. I just can't imagine my life without you. At least we can have lunch or breakfast together, or go for hangouts around the town during weekends. Gosh, wouldn't that be fun?

But i guess it will just remain to be a dream that won't come true. And the thing that we always fear it might happen to us (but unfortunately it always does), will happen too. Yeah, time will kill us and without staying in touch, we will become strangers again in no time. How funny is that?

I just wish that day will never arrive. The day we will feel awkward to ourselves cuz we had barely talk to each other. As i said earlier, im just too afraid to lose you. I don't want you to forget this 3-years of friendship. Yeah, people might see it as a very short period of time but you help me to feel like thousands of years thanks to your kindness,your annoying-but-adorable attitude and your lousy jokes, ahaa how can i forget that? As lame as it can be, it never fails to make me laugh, do you realize that? You are indeed one in a million. Im nearly want to cry while typing this but you know how egoistic i can be, right? Haha *sedut hingus*

Dah ada awek nanti jangan lupa kenalkan aku kat dia okay? :')

Love,

Your Ugly Best Friend

p/s: Goodbyes never fail to hurt me.

Rebecca Black's 'Friday' song analysis.

2011-03-26T02:00:00.000+08:00

HAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAAHA I hate this guy but man, his accent is just intolerable for me to not listen to HAHA. And i love the last part;

"Rebecca whatcha doin man? Its Monday biatch, hands off!"

LOL EPIC HAHA

April Wishes.

2011-03-25T22:27:00.001+08:00

Get good result for Sem 2
A maxi skirt mcm ni
A pair of wedges
Belanja family makang at a fine restaurant
Dah terer buat sambal belacan
Wake up earlier and no sleep after Suboh
Own at least ONE satin shawl

And by having a job i will make myself away from the internet for a period of time hence a nice weight lose in no time, ahah! Cukuplah seminggu ni je kerja aku makan tidur online makan tidur online makan tidur online online online online. online je lapar, lepastu update blog/twitter semua pasal makanan. lepastu pergi drive thru makan fast food bawak balik rumah, makan depan laptop while playing Sims 3. heckkk WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME

To confess or not to confess.

2011-03-23T04:59:00.000+08:00

In my case, this thing says YES. How about you? :)

Its just the starting point of a life-long journey.

2011-03-22T04:16:00.001+08:00

the absolute correct words to describe their feelings right now, heh.

Goodluck to those who are taking the SPM results tomorrow! Remember one thing, no matter what your result looks like,bear in mind, there's something awesome waiting for you to chase for after this. God knows well whats the best for you so never ever lose hope if you aint get what you want (or what people around you are expecting) cuz you will never know whats next for you after this. Lain orang, lain peluang, lain rezeki. So just take the result and live up! Your journey has just begun. And have fun exploring the real world, adik-adik! Ceh, adik-adik, tak menahan betul akak Raisya ni, hahahaha.

Oh, another thing. Tak mati pun kalau tak straight A's so just dont get too fcked up if youre not getting a good result. Yea, memang lah frust, id been in the same shoes as yours but life goes on, dude. Plus, failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely :) Once you've entered college life, y'll know that SPM is just nothing (i tell yaa) cuz your performance during matriculation and degree is way more important than those As in the slip. Im talking based on my own experience,yaw. So no doubt about that, heh.

Allah itu Maha Mengetahui dan Merancang segala-galanya, so have faith! :D

p/s: These words are also for my super annoying tapi (unfortunately hahaha) tetap disayangi little brother, Redzal Amri. Dapat result best, aku belanja Manhattan! :P

Self-torture.

2011-03-20T19:04:00.000+08:00

Siapa yang tengah lapar and sweet-toothed, please jangan tengok. Haha

Churrosss *drools*

Doughnuts and cream puffs

Moist chocolate cake slice

Waffle with fruits

Blueberry cheese tarts

Chocolate cake with strawberries topping and whipped cream

Waffle with ice-cream

Pancake with chocolate syrup and caster sugar

Waffle again, with vanilla ice-cream and chocolate syrup

Plain macaroons with cream

Macaroonssss

Cheese pie with strawberries and syrup

Waffle againnnn but now with whipped cream and strawberries

Chocolate ice-cream with nuts

Waffle (sorry but i cant help myself haha) with butter and chocolate

Pancakeeees. do i need to say moreee?

Cupcake with oreo ice-cream topping. What is this? Heaven? D:

Pancakes with honey and strawberries

Cheese cake slice

Froyoooo homaigad

Are you kidding me? T_T

*screams*

Okay enough of torturing yourself, Raisya. God, please bring me to New York City or Paris or wherever provides these so i can go and taste all these heavens! Its actually pretty weird to see me posting food pictures, especially desserts like this. FYI, I DONT EAT CHOCOLATE cuz i simply feels that the taste is weird, haha. Plus, my taste buds and tummy don't go really well with sweet foods that sometimes, i can actually throw up due to its excessive sweet taste in it.

But today, things go otherwise. I am craving all of these right now! Too bad Batu Pahat don't serve them a lot here except for Secret Recipe cakes and McDonald's pancakes -.- Anyone who is generous enough to bring me out and indulge ourselves with these made in heaven foods? Jom jom :D

Or should i just try my luck and prepare em by myself at home instead? *wink wink*

p/s: Nampak sangat tengah PMS zzzzz -.-

I request the highest of fives!

2011-03-20T04:01:00.000+08:00

First thing first, im home already :3

When we are talking about a 6-months of holiday (yeah you read that), we sure are talking bout lotssss of fun and good things that need to be done within the period. As i already have my own license and Andy with me, i guess there'd be no problem anymore for me to hunt a job and work. I desperately need money to survive this holiday. Not that my parents won't give any but weh segan beb mintak-mintak duit banyak sangat dari diorang (sekarang baru tau segan, dah matanglah konon hahahahaptuih). Plus, the idea of six months of grounding youself at home is probably the last thing to be considered.

So as usual, a checklist is just a must to maintain myself to be at the right track. It will be a listing of things i gotta do within this long holiday. Of course i won't need to worry about time as i got plenty of it haha. This is really helpful especially after getting the paycheck hahah. So here we go;

[ ] Shop for more clothes, shoes and scarfs

[ ] New hairdo

[ ] Car tint

[ ] Bedroom makeover

[ ] Learn to cook more dishes

[ ] Baking class (not sure myself haha)

[ ] Lose weight (this is the 372632th attempt so just shut up and pretend u just heard it for the first time will ya? zzz)

[ ] Be a better bibik at home

[ ] Play Sims 3 sampai muntah

I think itu je kot for now? Will update later if there's more X) So erm its already 4 in the morning and i guess its better for me to sleep now. Till then, xoxo :)

Goodbye Puncak Alam! :')

2011-03-18T20:24:00.001+08:00

After 8 months of roller-coasting conflicts and dramas, handful of stress and pain, erupting emotions and whatnots, my Asasi Sains programme in UiTM Puncak Alam has come to its end. Wait, let me try to let out the feeling now;

YEAH HABISSSS DAH HUMMA HUMMAAA YEAHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAH

ok dah :3

Feeling relief enough, i probably can say that i am quite satisfied with my life here, despite the not so fun part of studying in rush all the time. We went too furious sometimes, heh.

Done packing this evening, and goshh, i feel that awkward feeling when seeing my room has already empty now. We got our stuffs in the bags already and we put it all at the front hall. Its sad actually, to be apart with someone whom we had already started to feel comfortable with. Tak puas lagi nak karaoke dalam bilik ramai-ramai, tak puas lagi nak makan maggi ramai-ramai dalam bekas besaq, tak puas lagi nak main kejar-kejar dalam rumah, tak puas semua lahhh. Dahlah i ni susah untuk dipuaskan. Kejap apasal macam lain macam ayat ni? hahahahahahahha kbye

IM GONNA MISS YOU GUYS, LOVELIES! ♥

p/s: Gambar sebagai hiasan. Tataplah gigi taring tak jadi wa tu, mesti jatuh hati dengan si penulis hahah kbye

Saya penat, sungguh.

2011-03-18T03:43:00.000+08:00

The truth is, sometimes i practise fake smiles and laughters in front of you. But its all for the sake of us. Unfortunately, things are getting tougher now. You are quiet, i am silent. Until one point, i don't actually know what do i want from this relationship.

This is pretty sickening. I.am.tired. May God bless us.

Physics is never sick.

2011-03-15T16:02:00.000+08:00

Raisya suka Physics.

Tuuu diaaaa. Ada 20 chapter fizik aku kena master within 2 days. I bet this will be the LAST time i will be studying Physics evaaah. EVAH.

Tapi semalam siap sempat layan Kal Ho Na Ho siap nangis bagai hahahaahahahh Saif Ali Khan is so adorable yet Shah Rukh Khan is so romantic ahaaaaaa wish i was Preity Zinta hahahahaha k bai

Rawr, Biology!

2011-03-13T20:04:00.000+08:00

Esok paper Biology. And my future is depending on it. Yelah, konon pilih jurusan Sains Biology untuk degree nanti maka Biology haruslah A. Dayyum, A kot. Carry mark aku pun entah berapa je, aku tak check pun lagi -.-

Takpe, just tenangkan hati and jawab betul-betul esok. Cuma aku tak jamin aku dapat jawab penuh sebab paper esok start pukul 2 PETANG. Agaknya semua orang pun tahu kan apa hasilnya kalau kita gabungkan subjek Biologi dengan waktu petang yang optimum untuk tidur, kan? Pandainya yu ai ti em ni susun jaduaaaaal.

K bye. As usual, doakan saya dan rakan-rakan!

p/s: Tahniah Berita Harian masuk CNN hari ini. Kau hado? Cool lah kau, the-most-insensitive-and-inconsiderate-paper-ever. EVER.

Prayers for friends in Japan.

2011-03-11T22:27:00.001+08:00

"Antara 10 tanda kiamat ialah 3 kali gempa bumi; sekali di Timur, sekali di barat dan sekali di semenanjung Arab," (H.R. Muslim)

Whenever i stumble upon these kind of things, i mean 'tanda-tanda kiamat' and stuff related to it, i can feel myself shivering, y'know the disturbing feeling of a total fear of something big and, lethal? Kita tahu kita semua manusia akhir zaman, and kiamat boleh datang bila-bila masa. Maybe its the last stars we gaze tonight, maybe its the last sunset we watched just now. Maybe tonight will be the last one, and the next thing we know, we are already awake in the middle of a desert (sort of), with 8963926492549254986297873013870923870237431073401741 others with you. Imagine the total number of people since the years of the first man, Prophet Adam a.s until now. MasyaAllah tak dapat nak bayangkan.

Thats why, im trying my best to change myself to the better, cuz we'll never know whats next for us.

p/s: Done with Chemistry paper today. Ulasan : yetqjndxks hsggwyq ksolqygshks ksjiooruu. Tak faham? Macam itulah jugak aku masa baca soalan exam tadi. Cool rightttt, i know. Go die lah Raisya -.-

You wanna fly? You got to give up the shit that weighs you down.

2011-03-10T13:56:00.002+08:00

Hai, dah makan? Tjgbdjksgdfksfkhdofgdowaq.

Paper Maths dah lepas tadi. Alhamdulillah, mampu lah jugak jawab. At least, tak se-blur last sem -.- But still, i need to pray harder cuz my carry marks for Maths is not that satisfying and not much in helping me to put myself in the 'safe zone'. Ohh ya, soalan continuous distribution tadi saya jawab cara discrete distribution. Tahniah Raisya, 11 markah hilang, pfft. Careless is so my middle name. Sigh sigh sighhhh. Okay, esok Chemistry. Doakan saya dan rakan-rakan! Organic chem and Acid/Bases are not really nice with me sejak awal belajar, so yeah. Kalau esok tak dapat jawab dengan baik, wa tarik panjang-panjang spendar abang cafe malam esok, lepastu lepaskan. Piaaaaaappp! Pergh, puas hati.

Maaf, bila tengah exam memang macam ni. Mood entah apa-apa -.-

Dear you,

2011-03-07T20:54:00.006+08:00

Yeah, things getting tougher when we are still friends. We still argue on small silly things, we still text random funny things to each other, we still laugh on our own stupid jokes when nobody else understands it, we still tease each other till sometimes i just feel like killing you. But apart from that, you are still lending your shoulder for me to cry on whenever i fail in doing something or having problems on anything. Yeah, you are one of my secret box. Apart from your crazy head, you are still my best advisor ever. Even though sometimes it requires me to buy a snack plate from KFC (-.-) but you know what, i don't mind at all.

Its fun to have you around, but honestly it makes thing even harder for me. And you. But losing you is never my option. You are just err, one in a million?

Bye.

*UPDATED*
This will be the last post i think, at least until ive done with the finals haish. But biasalah nanti manalah tau tetiba rasa nak emosi pasal paper susah ke hape, pls expect another post from me hahahah whatever pergi belajarlah Raisyaaaaaaaaaa byeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Macam orang takda final, untunglah.

2011-03-06T22:23:00.001+08:00

Its pretty rare to see me uploading a bunch of pictures in my blog ever since i revamped it a couple of months ago. Well, azam konon nak write shorter entries with less pictures yada yada but things don't really go your way, numsayin'? Haha scratch that, let's go *tetiba*

Rented an auto Kia Spectra for a day. Anak orang kaya kan pffft =.=

Notice my oh-so-meriah shopping bag hahahaha. Bought a vintage handbag at the Asian Avenue. Oh, and the geek glasses too! :)

Jana's 'friend', Syafiq. Manjewnyeww.

Back from the Pyramid, we went to the infamous Shah Alam McD where you can actually see a lot of students lepaking and studying here, mostly are from UiTM Shah Alam. We decided to just meet the two stars here while Jana and Syafiq went for a 'quick date' at the iCity, heh. Untunglaaaaaahh. Hahaha :P

Jejaka misteri wtf hahah X)

Idk what the heck is wrong with my laptop but it kept on preventing me to get connected to the McD's free wifi line. Tak dapat online = boring. And as we were tooooo sleepy to even forced ourselves to lift our head up straight, we decided to go for a night roaming around Shah Alam.

Remember the story of the haunted Seksyen 2 bungalow house located at the opposite of the Wet World? Hahaaaa i finally managed to detect which house is it, and brrrrrrrr memang tak nampak seram langsung. Tried to locate the part of the house where it said to be the most haunted sebab ada pokok besar lah bagai kan, but yeah was too afraid to stare at the house any longer heuheuheu *penakut

We also went to the Mona Fendi's house *biting nails* yang tak siap tu, and ergh yang itu baru sereeeeemmmmmm gila bila tengok. The walls are already up, just that it is lack with windows and stuff, y'know. The mansion is in white colour, but the absence of lightings made it appeared freakingly haunted and er, haunted? Haha. Dahlah under moonlight beam, memang terbaik. Yang lagi terbaik bila tengah mood seram-seram tu tiba-tiba ada anjing menyalak tepi kereta sampai i dengan Chubun macam orang histeria menjerit zzzz T____T

Went to the Extreme Park too, but nampak macam banyak mat rewmpitz jeww so pergi cari tempat lain. Pergi uptown pulak, but its already near 4am so the shops and warungs dah banyak tutup. Frust, sebab tu first time pergi hahaha. Finally, we just went lepaking at the Dataran sambil usha mak nyah tepi jalan HAHA.

*jalan depan maknyah*

*sambil tunjuk-tunjuk kat Starbuz*

Me/Chubun : "Nama dia ni Arif Fitriii, dia singleeee. Last sem dah nak dapat 4flat dahh. Ada motoooo hahaha"

Starbuz : *mencarut sambil jalan laju-laju*

Hahahahaha :DD

After playing around at the old train thingy (yang kereta api lama iteww) felt like half of the mind wasn't there already. Mata dah mengantuk and the body already started to itch due to body fatique maka ajak Starby drive balik semula ke McD Shah Alam. Had our breakfast there :D (terus segar balik kehkehkeh)

Asyik cerita je, nah gambar *clears throat* heheh. Ohh the two stars mentioned earlier is referred to this two guys over here, meet Starby and Starbuz! Haha untunglah adik-beradik nama sama haha :P

Untunglahh :P

Untunglah kami bermata sepet, bila mengantuk mata nampak segaris je macam ni --> -.-

Arrived home (college to be exact, err) approx at 8 in the morning, masuk bilik je terus dozed off and awake again at 2pm hahahahah buruk perangai anak dara zzz. Had lunch at Bandar Puncak Alam and ABC! Ohhh i just learnt that 'ABC' and 'ais kacang' are just the same thangggg just that 'ABC' is like orang bandar punya bahasa and ais kacang is the kampung one hahaha boo me =.=

Till then, will be back whenever i feel like writing. Macam banyak jeee sebab nak lepaskan stress belajar nak finals. Padan muka, org study week pergi study kau pergi melepak bagai

*nangisss*

Hello March!

2011-03-04T15:18:00.002+08:00

Yang kat belakang tu nama dia Pawan Al-Muzammel. Dia terel Fizik sebab tu dia macam Albert Einstein sikit. Maksud Pawan ialah 'talking to the wind'. Alolololoh :P

Hey pretty/handsome readers ;)

FYEAH, all lectures and classes have officially come to its end TODAY, on the 4th March 2011. Had my last class for Asasi just now, its the Biology tutorial class, and we did our final quiz on Genetics *hentak kepala. Guys, faham tak its our final class for Asasi? How fast is that? *semangat. It feels like its just yesterday i made my first blogpost from here, Puncak Alam. Feels like just yesterday i carried those besaq godang bags from the ground floor to the 4th floor (yeah, my house is at the 4fth floor, level paling bising rasanya haha) using the STAIRS ONLY. Just because malas nak rebut lif with other families yang bawak beg godang masing-masing jugak. Phew can't believe i actually did that. Sekarang nak naik tangga to the 1st floor pun macam patah riuk haha -.-

For sure, i honestly love my life here, but exclude the study part lah (hahaha). Id met a looooooot of awesome people here, from different places and cultures (erk? haha) The studying part is hectic and tiring for sure (i wont lie about that! ahaa) BUT the people here are the ones who help me to get over the study stress and boredom. The place itself is actually convenient for us the students to study. I can say that the only distraction for us here is the Rafflesia cafe only, ohh and Igloo ice-creams too HAHAHA. And i can bet thats the only place where the Palamers can go socialized and stuff. Yeah that sounds pretty lame i know but its for our own good too, looking at the bright side kan. So takdelah melagha sangat (as if,haha) Whatever lah, dah nak habis Asasi dah pun so i dont really care now hahahaha :P

Okay i think thats all for now. The IIUM foundation students pun dah start their 3 months break kan? Untunglah, dah lepas azab final. AH AKU TAKNAK CAKAP PASAL FINALS AKU, KAU JANGAN BERANI NAK TANYA K BYE (emo bila dengar perkataan 'final' zzzzz)

Things don't always go our way.

2011-02-27T22:58:00.001+08:00

Does life is really about being told to do this and that, this and that, this and that, this and.. (sambung sampai esok) by other people? Does life is really about having someone else as your remote control, and you will just follow whichever button they press for us?

You know what, i maybe look like a total rebel (well i am actually but just because of some special rare cases only) but the idea of having other people to control whatever you are doing is just RUBBISH. Dude, go and mind your own life. Yeah i must admit sometimes we really need someone to guide us and teach us through life but hey, guide jelah tak perlu sampai nak suruh orang ikut menkhinzir buta cara kau. Lain orang, lain cara.

Contoh paling mudah, ada orang anggap music is a big distraction for them to focus while studying but for some other people, music is just a must for them so that they can stay energetic and won't go sleepy while going through words and numbers the whole night. With that,a simple conclusion can be made in instance - we don't have the right to easily ask other people to do things the way you want cuz not ALL people have the same brain wavelength as you. Again, lain orang, lain cara. Agree? Kadang-kadang kita nampak cara dia salah pada mata kita, but kita tak tau mungkin cara tu ialah yang paling baik untuk dia.

So stop asking me to do this and that the way YOU want it to be done, its irritating. Nak nasihat tu boleh lah but to command other people to follow your way, NO THANKS. I am NOT a robot.

p/s: Sorry for emo-ish posts from me lately. Blame the exams.

Kenapa mesti medic?

2011-02-25T01:06:00.000+08:00

'Kalau tak amek medic, maknanya tak pandai.
Memang medic jelah yang boleh jamin masa depan. Course lain semua bodoh.'

Tak tahu sampai bila kita semua nak buat mindset macam ni. Mindset yang membebankan pelajar macam aku.

The truth is, its really hard and painful to live in other people's expectations and hopes.

p/s: Mood tak stabil. Asyik menangis lately. Rasa loser, rasa frust, rasa bodoh. Memang macam ni lah each time nak exam besar. Lagi-lagi bila fikirkan mak bapak. May Allah hear my prayers.

This study load is tiring and getting too overwhelming.

2011-02-22T23:00:00.000+08:00

Hambek kau Nescafe dengan Red Bull sekaligus.

So you already noticed my queuing workloads waiting to be done and submitted within this week. Pretty much a busy week for me this time, plus with the Test 2 thingy. FYI, Test 2 is starting this Thursday. The first paper would be Chemistry, which for me is the most killing subject evahhhhh, even since i was in my school days. SPM pun dapat A- je. Face it, i hate the fact where i need to memorize the long, weird chemical names and to follow the demanding rules from Bohr's, Arrhenius', Hess's, yada yada. Why don't the scientists just gathered up and work together to come out with only ONE brilliant rule that satisfies everyone's theory? Or bila dah jumpa one better theory, we just replace the old with the new one without the need to learn about the old one. Kan? Zzzzz scientists are just being themselves, Raisya. Semua pun nak merasa jugak capub nama sendiri dalam rule masing-masing. Nama masing-masing pun macam taknak kalah je kan =.=

Sometimes i even wonder, do all the things i studied all this time,especially Physics (my another killer subject pfft) are really applicable in my daily life like now? Do i really need to know how to measure a parallelepiped's volume? Do i really need to calculate the number of ways the letters in word 'INFINITY' can be arranged in everyday life? And like in the picture above, DO I REALLY NEED TO KNOW THE STAR COLOR EACH TIME I GO STARGAZING WITH MY KIDS? Wow i can sense this paragraph is starting to go a bit emo-ish now hahahahahahah.

But hey, bukan ke Allah memang perintahkan hambaNya untuk menuntut ilmu? Plus, why merungut? You have no idea how many people out there would love to have what you've got now - the chance of studying. Education is important, that is what we've been told for ages. Education plays a big role in your life, where it can make a lot of changes in your life, and in yourself too. There is this one quote from sir Will Durant (me too have no idea who the eck he is but who cares anyway, for sure he must be a philosopher or something haha) : 'Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance'. So peeps, stop being ignorant and go eat the books! Haha okay kidding.

Anyways, i must admit that studying is indeed tiring. And i mean, REALLY tiring. It drives me crazy sometimes with all those work loads and stuff, sometimes i even cried cuz the pressure is just too much. Plus the high expectations people throws on you, the idea of studying is somewhat not really a pleasant thing to do each time your brain is too exhausted and your body starts to ache like hell due to lack of rest and sleep. Kalau kena kat manusia yang tak reti nak handle stress macam i ni, hambek kau terus dapat migraine. In my case, i have this type of migraine called 'Ocular Migraine'. Baru dapat masa Sem 2 ni sigh. So each time kena migraine attack, the pressure and stress went doubled up till at one point where i just want to ask somebody to kill me. No kidding, it always happened that way =.=

But put a reminder for yourself, no matter how many times you feel like giving up in studying cuz you feel like they are just beyond your limits and abilities, and you just feel like a total idiot for not understanding certain subjects/topics, just remember one thing : Studying is one of our jihads. I always remind myself with this. Plus, the life itself is a test ground and this studying thing is just one of the tests he granted on us. We are being rigorously tested by Him, just to see whether or not we will turn towards Allah or go away from him.

"The greater the tests we go through the more Allah is wanting to raise our ranks in the hereafter"

InsyaAllah kalau ikhlas, Allah pasti permudahkan urusan kita :)

Meanwhile, kak Megan already taught me this one thing to believe in:

YEAH. HAHAHAHA :P

P/s : Elok-elok bagi nasihat ala IluvIslam terus tak jadi sebab ada kakak angkat i ni. HAHA okay bye bye.

Its already near to the end

2011-02-21T01:31:00.000+08:00

My life is so effing dull right now (at this very particular moment) due to the exam mood surrounding the whole college. Everyone has already started their engines and speeding up day by day. Frowns, pimples and eyebags are now our bestest friends. Everyone has put on their nerd glasses and carry around those thick encyclopedia-look-alike books, even to the cafe for supper. You gotta watch how much people can transform themselves completely here, just by having finals in another 18 days. Kuatnya impak 4flat tu.

Dan aku, masih disini, mengupdate blog macam orang takda final, sigh. The truth is, id already stressed out with all this finals thingy. Gosh, can't people here just stop talking about it at least for about, five minutes? I am already much aware of that and i don't need repeating reminders every single day, it annoys me like total hell. Get it? Chillax lah, bukan kau sorang je nak final. Ha kan dah emo dah ni grr grr ;(

Anyways, 18 days more to go for our finals, and that indicates another one important thing too - the end of Asasi programme in UiTM Puncak Alam for us, Asasians batch 2010/2011. So in previous post, i told that i had this jumbled up feelings about it right? But i think i already figured out what is the exact feeling i should wear for that.

Yeah, im going to be sad when all of this ends this 18th March 2011. Puncak Alam gives me so much experiences and lessons to be learnt from various people and situations. I met a bunch of awesome new people here from all states, and i had the opportunity to tighten up the bonds even more between me and my ex-schoolmates from TIGS and SAMURA. Its a nice feeling to see ourselves growing up so fast. One minute we were wearing our lame baju sekolah and another minute we are already studying in university. How cool liddat? Time flies superfast nowadays :')

Im going to write more on this but not now for sure, as its already 1.15AM right now. Sigh, i really have missed a lot of my beauty sleep sessions since i studied here. My sleeping hours go nuts and my melatonin level gets lower that it affects my biological clock - im pretty sure about that since id just finished studying nervous system just now muehehehe :P So erm talk to ya later aitte munchkins? Much loves from me, goodnight ♥

p/s: What do you think about my latest blog layout huh? *angkat angkat kening* HAHA :P

Keep calm and sit for finals.

2011-02-19T20:57:00.000+08:00

Lagi 26 hari before i habis program Asasi kat UiTM Puncak Alam ni. Taktau lah nak rasa apa. Gembira, teruja, sedih, rasa nak nangis, rasa nak sujud syukur, rasa nak peluk semua orang, rasa nak belanja semua orang aiskrim Igloo, rasa nak menjerit kat padang kawad, rasa nak baring kat tengah jalan depan fakulti, rasa nak salam pak guard, rasa nak cium okay takpayah cakap kot nama, haha.

But seriously, i dont know what to feel about this. Excited much? Not really i think.

CUTI MESTI WA MATI KERING KEBOSANAN KAT RUMAH 6 BULAN T________T

k bye, Finals lagi 19 hari, aku pun taktau apa yang aku dah study sekarang. Tuhan je tau macam mana penatnya aku sekarang :( Tapi takpelah, everything comes with a price, and nothing comes easily in life. So just pay anything that counts. Goodluck other Asasians! May Allah bless us, Aminnnnnn.

p/s: Mom/Dad if youre reading this, can u guys come over here in Puncak Alam at least before i face my finals? Rasa awkward and incomplete if tak jumpa dulu :/